Innocence

Photo by John Carey (http://fiftyfootshadows.net)

Kenny tapped the eraser of his pencil against his temple. He had a deadline and it didn’t help that his bosses found it helpful to remind him constantly of said deadline. It had been a 6-week project thus far and everyday he felt like he was running backwards in a sandbox. He knew that of the 4 other members of his team, he was expected to keep everyone organized and on task, which was sometimes difficult with the lot he was given. But it had proven beneficial to hold team meetings on Fridays, in which the reward for completing all of that day’s task was leaving early for the bars.

This night should have been no different, but it was. Such is life he supposed.

“Hey Ken, you got that stack of 4x4 cards with client info on them I left for you yesterday,” Jim, Kenny’s’ boss, asked.

“Yeah Jim, I left it at the house, I can get them to you tomorrow.”

Jim sighed heavily as he leaned against the cubical wall.

“Shit Ken, I’m supposed to give them to Dave Jones tonight at the company meeting. Can you do me a solid and get them now?”

Kenny looked at the office clock. It was nearing 6:45pm now and it was his wife’s birthday. He had promised Carol he would be home by 9 at the absolute latest. There was no way that was going to happen now. He envisioned himself strangling Jim.

“Yeah…I’ll go.”

He got his keys and walked out of his office, into the hallway and called the elevator. While the elevator was taking its time, Kenny decided to just take the stairs. To say he was frustrated was like saying if you touch an electrified fence you might get shocked. It was a good thing he left when he did, otherwise he might have carried out his vision of strangulation.

As he got in his car he realized something. I forgot my damn jacket… oh well no time now. He started the car and was off. His wife was probably not going to be so happy about this. It was looking like, if he was lucky, he might be home by midnight. And sure enough, she was not so thrilled as he walked in to tell her the news.

“What do you mean you still have work,” she asked coldly.

“I told you, Jim is being a bitch about this information thing that he just has to have for tonight. It was this or be looking for another job.”

“You don’t know if he would fire you or not so don’t use that excuse. It’s my birthday. This day has been scheduled to be my birthday for 35 years. It’s the same date every year. How do you do so well at work but when it comes time for your family, it only works if it’s fucking convenient!”

Tears were rolling down her pretty cheeks as she screamed out at him. He too felt like he wanted to cry and scream, but there was no changing the situation. If he hadn’t walked out at that moment he would have broken down.

“I have to go back to work.”

Then she said it. He wish he hadn’t heard it and in fact, he pretended not to. But that doesn’t mean he didn’t get the pleasure of thinking about it the entire ride back to the office.

“I lost the baby.”

That was all it took. He left quietly. The 4x4 cards in one hand, the car keys in the other. And rage. Pure, straight, rage. It filled him up. It was like a cloud of fog that slowly overtakes you as you drive down the road; only this time it was overtaking his mind. What did I do to deserve this? Who did I piss off in heaven to make this kind of karma come to me? All valid questions, but at the same time all irrelevant.

It didn’t matter.

Does it ever?


This was written several years ago, but I figured a good first post.

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