Meditation has always intrigued me. For years, close friends have sworn by it. & in the past, I’ve tried self-guided meditation through apps like Calm & Headspace. But I haven’t been able to quite get there.
Last week, after the attack in New York, I decided to attend my first guided class. I’d been back in the states for less than a week, & was already feeling a overwhelmed & anxious about general re-entry. It felt like the right time. My goal: to feel better when I leave than when I walked in. (TBD on if that’s even the right goal. Or if having a goal is even a good thing?)
The class served its purpose. I didn’t walk out feeling changed, but it was comforting, calming, & re-assuring to be in that space, surrounded by a group of people who had chosen to be there, to collectively direct their energy to a place of positive energy.
Two nights ago, I signed up for an unlimited month of meditation at a studio in Brooklyn. & my goal is to attend thirty classes over the next thirty days*. I’ll be writing about my experience here — not every day, just when I have things to say**.
I’ll start with this:
A lot of beginners guides to meditation talk about knowing your “why.” For me, it’s really about getting more in touch with myself, & my emotions. It’s about mindfulness, & self-discovery. & also about building more awareness & empathy for the world & the people around me.
I’ve been on this journey for a few months now. Quitting VaynerMedia was step one — for the eight years previous to that, I’d always felt like my identity was tied to that place, & that my mind was at some level always tied to it as well. Over the last three months, I’ve relaxed, I’ve travelled, & I’ve thought — a ton. I’ve written a lot, more in a journal than here. I’ve also gotten a lot better at being in the moment.
But it’s a long process, & one that I believe meditation can help. So, here we go.
* This is just the beginning. By building a rhythm & taking a high volume of classes with a wide variety of teachers whose practices & styles differ, I hope that I’ll then be better suited to guide myself.
** I’m also writing a more unfiltered series here, where I’ll share more real-time quick thoughts from each class, if you’re interested.
Have you meditated before? Do you meditate often? Is it something you’ve wanted to do but haven’t yet pursued? I’d love to know. While meditation is very much a solitary experience, I think its lessons are much better shared.