When I left Vayner four months ago, I had a vision for how things would go. I’d decompress, travel for a few months, come home to New York, & pick my life back up. I’d find the next career opportunity. Work hard. Play basketball in the mornings. Brunch on the weekends. It would be perfect.
Three weeks ago, that plan began to unfold before my eyes —I was offered a very early position at a super rad young company with a ton of upside. I’d get to help build a product — & a team. I’d have lots of control. Work with a killer founding team. Equity. Benefits. Growth potential. It would be perfect.
& yet, despite the job being the logical progression in my life — & a literal dream come true,
I’m going back to southeast asia.
As my grandmother texted me recently: “Follow your heart and you’ll be fine… You’ll never get these years back.” & my heart tells me I left that part of the world unfinished — she tells me there’s so much left to do.
It’s a mindfuck, for sure. There was lost sleep. Self-doubt. Comparisons. What do you work for, if not for your career? What were those eight years for?
But every decision leads you somewhere new. Sometimes, to places unexpected. & every experience builds on the last & leads to the next. Somehow, & for some reason.
There are no absolutes. There’s no black & white. There are no perfect decisions. & no guarantees. You can have “everything” & all of a sudden nothing. & it’s all made up, anyway. It’s all just a story. Happiness. Success. How life should be lived.
& life is short. & life is crazy.
So, I leave on January 9th, with a one-way ticket to Cambodia, & a tight budget. Then some diving in southern Thailand, a journey through Vietnam & Laos, & back to Chiang Mai & Pai, where it all really began.
I’ll focus on intention, & improvement. & on discovery — about myself, & the people & the world around me.
I’m going to allow the universe to guide. I’m going to trust my heart. & I’m going to trust the journey — or as we say in Philly, the process.