The Best Friendship There Is — the one with yourself

Two years ago, when I began learning meditation from you, Artie, the idea that made the strongest impression on me was this: sit with your monkey mind, like a friend. Such a simple solution, really. It may seem counter-productive to invite someone nagging at you to spend time sitting next to you. I mean that’s the last thing you want, right? Meditation, I thought was meant to be a break — you are trying to get some time out, away from the nagging, worrying, nitpicking, fault-finding, anxious, panicking, tantrum-throwing voice! Inviting it to spend that break with you is, like you said, running the opposite direction. It made perfect sense, yet wasn’t supposed to make sense.

I am glad I learned to do this, because it prepared me for some hard times that were to come my way. Sitting with my monkey mind, in and out of meditation, has been the most powerful tool that I have learnt. There are so many stories of my growing bond and friendship with my monkey mind — we’ve laughed together, teased each other, sulked and been mad at each other, hugged and thanked each other, spent very quiet times together, wept together, and through this I have learnt, there is no friend like one’s monkey mind.

Worries come, hardships come, trials by fire happen, but who cares when you have a friend like that with you 24/7, who stands up for you, fiercely defends you, works for you, watches your back and cares for you like no other?

I wondered once what monkey mind wants in return for all that she does. I asked her. She said, “Talk to me.”

“Just that? No treats? Rewards?”

“No, just talk to me.”

Speechless.