Ritual Death Dance of the Human Adult Male
Research Log 532A — Human adult males are a most curious Earth life form. Unlike all other earth species, the human male doesn’t live a life span as dictated by evolutionary vectors. Instead, he chooses to self-expire around 35 solar rotations.
Of particular note in this life cycle is the Ritual Death Dance. We do not know why this life form chooses to self-terminate before his evolutionary potential. At present, the data is inconclusive.
We have identified how this process begins and ends. We have not yet determined an evolutionary (and social) rationale. Data inconclusive.
Onset of Death Cycle
Markers of the onset of the death cycle as follows
- Replication — he has passed his genetic code to offspring.
- Territorial awareness — to members of his tribe, his mouth tones (and waving gestures) signify that he possesses elements of his local environment.
- Molting Impossible — ownership of elements precludes a physical and psychological molting process. We believe our studies of earth insect and reptilian life will be crucial here. Data inconclusive.
- Pattern Recognition — At approximately 35 solar rotations, the human male develops an acute sense of Deja vu. Many of these Deja vu experiences are centered around the work circle. Deja vu is the primary catalyst for the death cycle.
- Response to Pattern Recognition — tribal member mouth tones and facial expressions connote scorn and mistrust for this newly acquired trait. This negative feedback takes a severe psychological and physical toll on said male. Note: From previous studies, we have observed depression in cephalopods. We believe we have observed similar behavior in human adult males.
Purging Process
At this stage, this male’s mouth tones and physical gestures become incomprehensible to all tribal members. At present, our studies show that the onset of Deja vu is similar to early stage symptoms of a terminal disease. Perhaps, this factor is the key to his lifecycle process? Data is inconclusive.
Once this disease is identified, tribal elders eject this unfortunate life form out of the working circle. Once ejected, approximately 5 younger life forms (aged around 21 Solar Rotations) attempt to perform his work details. For a non-human observer, the results are quite comical! Note to self — include video footage for further study.
To the tribe, this process is quite humorless. From previous studies, facial expressions and mouth tones appear to emote scorn, mistrust, sarcasm, and ultimately relief. Tribal sentiment accuracy is 95% significant here.
Communal Death Dwelling
What happens to the ejected male? After the shunning process, he is forced to live alone, or with a group of similarly shunned males. This communal dwelling is often decayed and highly disordered. Once the male enters this dwelling, the death cycle is significantly accelerated. Our observations suggest that all tribal members (including the shunned) are somewhat self-aware of this process. Sidenote: human self-awareness is not continuous. Self-awareness often surfaces around tribal events. Once manifest, it quickly recedes into repetitious duties centered around some mysterious purpose. Data inconclusive to discern this purpose.
90 Morning Meals
After roughly several earth rotations within this purgatorial (note: tribal religious reference) dwelling, the human male begins his final preparation for self-termination. Each morning, he stares impassively at the sunrise — while eating a pre-packaged breakfast of indeterminate age.
We believe the age of this ingested material is geological in time scale. Interestingly, this food stuff contains 0% sustenance for life. Given facial expression and lack of mouth tones, we believe the male is consumed by self-hatred and does not desire nutrition. Note — Food samples required to complete study. Also, self-hatred may be conclusive evidence for human self-awareness. Further study required.
Interestingly, we observe moisture flowing from his eyes at frequent (and seemingly random) intervals.
Our studies show that roughly 90 of these morning meals are required to psychologically prepare for self-termination.
Ritual Death Dance
Beyond mating rituals, Human males dance once in their lifetime. The death dance ritual is performed alone. Strangely, this dance is often guided by rhythm and tones exclusive to human females under 14 solar rotations. Human male mouth tones and gestures suggest that these tribal rhythms (historically irritating) are now appropriate to the final task at hand.
Post this dance, the human male inserts a metal projectile into a circular tube. Sulfur and charcoal act as fuels, and saltpeter is an oxidizer. He pulls (and releases) an impact hammer. The resulting explosion moves the projectile at significant speed. Our studies show — probability of self-termination is 90%.
Tribal Death Ritual
Given the shunning process, a tribal funeral ritual is curious. Why is the deceased not left to rot or recycled as plant fertilizer? Data is inconclusive here.
Post termination, the tribe accepts the carcass back into the community. Members of the tribe emit crying and cooing mouth sounds that appear to be an intelligible language. Perhaps, the tribal members believe that the disease is viral only within a living male? More study is required here
Epilogue
I will greatly miss studying the human adult male. In one earth rotation, I’m traveling to the Tau Ceti cluster. I’m being re-assigned to study the lifecycle of zekial worms. I believe these worms will be the highlight of my career — I’m so excited! Goodbye Earth.
Writer’s note
I was in the middle of writing something else. This one popped out quickly enough to justify the time spent. I’m releasing this one a little earlier than usual — the visuals are not baked yet. Need some SciFi TLC to finish it.
I’m really looking forward to my upcoming piece, the Last Paragraph — a mashup of Asimov’s Last Question and the Huffington Post . Highly surreal and visual.
