Waking Up Bitter

Logical Reason(s) Behind It

I woke up bitter. It was biting and new to me, I’d woken up sad or exuberant, but bitter? What happened?

It’s pleasant knowing there are still new experiences to be had, or that I’d forgotten the last time and this was my new first, but I’d still like to know why…

So here’s a little list of possibilities that I’ve been considering:

  • My guardian angel knows today’s gonna suck and has prepped me for it
  • Someone changed their will as I slept, diminishing my vast inheritance
  • PokemonGo updated in my sleep and I’m level 1 (AGAIN)
  • Lipstick-Face Demon from Insidious didn’t want to possess my body cause I was “too old for him”
  • A BlockBuster sign flickered on for a second before powering off permanently
  • My dog used the bathroom but didn’t flush or wash her hands afterward
  • I thought of a clown. Why they always get to be happy, huh?!
  • Someone recorded me sleeping, but didn’t get my good side
  • HotPockets discontinued their pizza flavor without consulting me
  • Someone shaved their Pomeranian to look like an awkward lion
  • Poodles exist*

*If you’d like to know my feelings about poodles, inquire below in the comments, or just think about it while you sleep so you can wake up bitter too👍