There is so much truth in this. I am certainly guilty of relying too heavily on my romantic relationships for all my emotional support, and it really is unfair to place that kind of pressure on a single person. In my case, it actually drove the person away.

I think there is merit, as a man, in a) learning to become more self-reliant with regards to emotional turmoil, and realising that it is okay to feel and to give yourself an internal safe space to do so, and then b) find a safe space with close, supportive male friends who can share in your stresses and pains and help you through them. These spaces will look different for men and women, but they should nonetheless exist.

Women are so good at creating those spaces for each other, but men are terrible at it, and I think you touched on the reason really well here with regards to the fear of blurring the lines between the emotional and the sexual.

Really an excellent piece, thank you!