Audi Service in France destroyed my Q5 but they will not compensate. Join ‘Burn my Audi festival’
I can’t make this short so please bear with me. This is story about Audi Gmbh, Audi Service Aubagne, Allianz, the corrupt French legal system and the absence of the concept of ‘guarantee’ in France. Skip this blog unless you are interested in French culture, law, logic or cars.
When we temporarily moved to France a year ago, I drove there with my Finnish Audi Q5 (2009 model with a 2l, TFSI engine). It is — was — the best car I have ever had. I january this year I took it for a normal 100 000 km service to the official Audi Service near Marseille in a town called Aubagne (Autosude Bernebau). The car has always been normally serviced at Audi Service in Finland and it worked well. The Audi/Volkswagen in Aubagne looks like any normal upscale car-dealership. I used a formal Audi-service location to be ‘safe’.
When I fetched the car from the service they told me that everything was ok and I paid the 960 euro. Before having the service I had mentioned that it sometimes run’s ‘unevenly’ and the service woman’s advised to use 98 octane instead of the French 95 octane gasoline which she said, can potentially be harmful to an Audi-engine. When picking up the car she again advised my to fill the tank with 98 octane gasoline. I drove to the nearest Total gasoline station and filled the tank. After filling, I let the engine run when I ‘checked’ that tyre pressure etc. (when in France one learns to always double check everything a French service company has done). While doing it I noticed that the engine now had a ‘new’ uneven sound. I foolishly presumed it was what the service woman had called ‘the 95 octanes’ problem but I still decided to record the sound on my phone. I thought no more of it and drove home — a 20 minute’s drive. Two days later I used it again when we started for a trip to Paris with my wife. A few kilometres later, while driving up a steep hill on the highway passing Cassis, the car engine suddenly sounded like it ‘exploded’, the car made some big jumps and within no more than thirty seconds all power drained away. I barely managed to get the car to the side of the road. The engine would not start again. We called Audi road service and after some hours we were towed back to the same Audi Service in Aubagne where it had been serviced two days before.
The French Circus began. A French ‘expert-circus’ is a larger group of people who all want to participate and give their opinion of any subject imaginable. I will not bother you about all the details but after weeks of meetings we realized that Audi Service had no intention whatsoever of fixing the problem or compensating us. They refused to give an alternative car and they all shook their shoulders in a way that only a Frenchman can do while stealing your money and apologizing for it at the same time. In person-to-person discussions several persons admitted that the actual service guy who did the the work on our car was a rookie idiot and he should have noticed that something was wrong from the sound of the engine. They admitted that he definitely should not have let me drive off with it. But the CEO with his glued pathetic smile said that he really would love to solve the problem but his hands were tied. Audi GMBH has an agreement with the german insurance company Allianz to handle all bigger claims and guarantee issues. He explained that Audi has outsourced these kinds of problems to their insurance company — Allianz.
First we therefore had to wait for the insurance company’s expert come and make his evaluation. Smirkingly the CEO promised that they would take full responsibility as soon as Allianz gives them permission for it. He brilliantly concluded that we now should try to find out the reason for this unfortunate explosion in the engine. So we waited and waited. Then after some months Allianz informed us that their expert cannot be sure of what had caused problem. Since their obviously brilliant expert did not know why the engine exploded — they could unfortunately not accept responsibility.
My video, the fact that the service company had delivered an obviously broken car and that the installed spark plugs were broken — was of no relevance for them. They wanted to know the ultimate the reason why the engine exploded. I know that logic is a foreign concept in the French culture but to me it sounded like listening to an insane person. I learned that Allianz often takes cases to court for what they call ‘clarification purposes’. It is a very effective way to ‘clarify’ the lies of foreign complaints. Foreigners have a tendency not to wait for years to get a ruling so they thereby admit that they were wrong and escape to their foreign country. I can smell the catholic inquisition-principle in the air. In France, rules and bureaucracy are the essence of life and business. Logic is not French. Most seem to despise that concept. The dear CEO now had a new suggestions — I only needed to pay 20 000 euro for a new engine. Then the problem would be solved quickly.
We hired a lawyer and filed a complaint in Marseille court. Our lawyer was very upbeat about the case because he was one of the best consumer rights lawyers in Marseille. (Strangely enough you can talk to a hundred lawyers in Marseille and they are all the top 1%). I was promised a quick process. First though, we naturally again needed more experts– one for us and one more for them. Both experts again wisely agreed that the two cylinders was broken and their two spark-plugs were also broken. They could though not really agree on which broke first. When my adrenalin rose I could see visions of chickens and eggs. Neither of the experts naturally had any idea of why the sparkplugs had broken or what had gone wrong.
I tried to point out that ignition program check and reprogramming are part of the 100 000 km service — so the service company had done something to it. Neither had any knowledge about Audi software and they clearly let me know that there are no ‘visible proof’ of software. Software are soft things — these guys were experts on hard things. If it is not material, then these they could not inspect it. For software we would need to find an software — ‘invisibility’ expert and experts for car-invisibility = software are hard to find and expensive. Most probably invisibility experts also would only understand french software and Audi is using German-language software. (I didn’t have the energy to point out that software are not written in that kind of languages.) Our wise hardware experts now therefore concluded that ignition software was not relevant in my case. My only victory was that I did manage to get them to abandon the idea that it was God’s will. God’s will happens often in France and it is conveniently not covered by the Audi Service guarantee.
I am lucky that my French is so bad that I only understood part of the discussions by these ‘certified’ experts. I have a master in engineering and for two years I worked in engine companies doing testing of combustion engine cylinders. I tried to explain the experts that I have very good understanding on how and what influenced a car engine cylinder. My opinion and input was naturally totally irrelevant and absurd because I am not French and my French is not even fluent.
I still havent met an expert in France that even reasonably understands english. English speaking experts are a separate type of expert — they are called international expert and work on import/export, seagoing vessels or something ‘foreign’ and hence rather inferior expertise work. A true expert is a French patriot who speaks nothing but French. If my French would be better I would certainly had started screaming and most probably hitting these lunatics with something hard. I know, it wouldn’t have helped my case.
I finally got my paper, the expert opinion from these high priests. In writing they finally concluded that the engine had to be changed or it needed a repair. Heureka, halleluja — I have been blessed by words of wisdom.
The Audi service CEO now very politely suggested that I should sue to the sparkplug producer. Since I for some obscure reason did not like that idea, he got another brilliant idea. I should buy a new similarly used car from him. Smilingly he promised to compensate something for the old although it had no engine. He is such a sympathetic and brilliant person. He should move to Hollywood and play the role of the ‘honest French car salesman’. I though have to admit that his acting skills are quite limited. He can only keep his false smile for approximately 30 seconds — then his face turns into a grimace. He was really sorry that he could not return the service fee but the personnel let me understand that they could refund me the cost of the spark plugs.
So now in the end of july, six months after the engine exploded, we got a ‘intermediate’ ruling by the aging judge. He has been thinking a lot on our problem and in his great wisdom he has decided that he wants more information. He would like to know WHY the engine exploded. The fact that Audi service delivered a faulty car and I have proof of it — was of no interest to him. From his high judge-chair he ordered the we should hire yet another expert. His named personal expert should do a more thorough inspection into the nature of the problem. He ruled that the expert has eight months time to conclude this new inspection. He conveniently forgot to set a price cap. I must therefore follow the whims and ideas of this new expert if I wish to go on with the legal process. There are no limitations or rules on how such a court appointed expert should carry out the inspection. If the expert order’s air-transport of my car to Germany for software inspection, I will be legally obliged to pay the bill. When I think of it, I see no real difference between rulers in the ‘Game of Thrones’ and my judge in the french legal system.
My lawyer admitted that it most probably will take another year before the judge makes his decision. Meanwhile naturally my lawyer will charge thousands because he needs to use a lot of time to supervise the work of my expert. I tried to point out that the car should have a legally obligatory inspection in Finland so it cant’s be left stand in France for another year. The judge obviously couldn’t care less that his ruling results in that I have to break Finnish laws. Finland is somewhere far north beyond the wall in the wilderness. The car must stand and wait for the next expert-inspection if I do not wish to surrender — which even a baby can understand, is the judge’s aim with his obscure ruling.
The judge is quite old and in the initial hearing his only comment was that 130 000 km is quite much for a car. A French car engine is not known to last very much past 100 000 kilometres. France has the third most corrupted legal system in west Europe. They are proud because they less corrupt than Italy and for instance Macedonia.
My car is still standing at Audi Aubagne and I have no more money to fight the war against the French system. My scandinavian friends adviced against trying to get justice in France. Even if I continue, it is fully possible that the ruling will be that I should sue the sparkplug company. Or then he rules that I should seek compensation from Volkswagen Group in Germany. France has one of the worst consumer protection laws in west Europe.
A curious fact which obviously is making my situation worse is that Audi has admitted worldwide that their 2 liter TFSI engines from 2009–2011 (same as mine) had a constructional technical faults in their piston rings. The piston rings are manufactured by faulty materials which with time are causing oil to leak, damage to pistons and cylinder pressure to change. A class action suit in the US forced them to fix or change all of these engines free of charge. Audi has also been forced to do the same in the UK and many other countries. But not in France where they are fighting hard against such rulings. If they admit that this was the reason that my engine ‘exploded’ — they would admit legal fault in France. We could have been injured since the speed dropped from 120 km/h to full stop within seconds. Luckily the traffic was light. Audi would have to pay a lot of damages if we would have had an accident — presuming of course that there exists a honest and technically skilled french expert that had the courage to say that the piston ring problems was the root cause for our accident. Anyone with a engineering degree and an IQ above 100 understands that this basic construction error IS the reason behind the fact that my engine exploded.
I had informed Audi before the service that my engine had this construction problem and hence it was using more oil than normal. Since the piston and cylinder coils in my car obviously have this construction fault, the pressure in the cylinders change over time. When this occurs slowly, the ignition and sparkplugs ‘adjust’. I tried to explain to Audi Service that when they ‘corrected’ the ingnition program during the service procedure, the new ignition settings were unsuitable for my engine. Hence, when I started to use it again it did not function properly. When ignition timings are not in synchronization with cylinder-piston-pressure data — engines tend to ‘explode’. This should be rudimentary for anyone with even a basic eduction about how engines work. Clearly, at Audi Aubagne there are no people with this kind of rudimentary eduction — or then they were ordered to be silent. The honest french car sales CEO, with a straight face, told me that he had not heard about any construction problems in the 2 liter TFSI engines. I presume he has also never heard about that Volkswagen lied about diesel emissions. All of our technical experts also seemed totally unaware that ignition timings can cause engine damage. Every time I pointed out that this was the ‘WHY’ — they looked at me as if I was a retarded child. I should not disturb when French wisdom is working.
We know now from the diesel scandal that the Audi/Volkswagen corporate culture strongly favours lying for the sake of profit. Nothing I have read or heard makes me believe that this has changed. They still try to use ‘scorned earth’ tactics to avoid further losses. If such culture-change really has happened — it certainly has not reached the south provinces of France yet. Anyone following my parody understands that Audi is using every lie and legal fight in their book to prevent me from proving that their construction fault is the ‘why’ that everybody is talking about here. Allianz is their global soldier which is ‘taking care’ of their problems. Volkswagen/Audi has very much in common with Donald Trump. They both use different facts and truths for each audience and country.
I cannot sue Volkswagen Group in France because I do not belive that I would receive a fair trial in France without having a enormous legal budget. French laws are very good at protecting car manufacturers from their production errors. The reason for these laws are that Renault, Citroen and Peugeot would all have been bankrupted a long time ago if the laws were more stringent and they would have had to pay for all of their construction errors. Americans car manufacturers are total amateur-lobbyists compared to how French car companies influence French legislation.
After all this and another twelve months, the judge — especially if he has missed his daily Bouillabaisse — might for some ‘strange’ reason be on a bad mood. He has the legal right to, with a moments ‘whim’, decide that I did not even have enough reason to start this court process. Marseille is not known to be foreigner-friendly. Le Pen has a strong following in these parts of France. He can force me to pay all Allianz lawyers costs and their experts. My friend concluded that potentially the bill can exceed 100 000 euros. In France if you fight the powerful, the weak and poor always looses. I wonder if the Audi Aubagne CEO has the guts to send me me an invoice for parking space at Audi Aubagne?
So much for the joke they call ‘lex modo gallico’.
If nothing else I hope this story can save people from similar humiliation in France. Maybe someone even gets inspired to fight evil, lies and deceit even if the liars and the evil are big and powerful. If you live near the border, service your cars outside of France. If not, use a small service firm who is a friend of your buthcher who is a friend of your neighbour. That’s the only insurance and guarantee that works in France and then you don’t need to come close to the big and false.
I am now building a homepage for all relevant information there. By the end of the week I’ll have all info and Ill send it then.
So finally I come to my conclusions which are :
1) I cannot afford continuing the legal fight against Audi and Allianz. Does anyone know a honest person at Audi/Volkswagen who could look into my case? Yes, I know I am an idealistic optimist.
2) Alternatively how about this:

I am consider a crowdsourcing campaign on to finance the burning on my beloved Audi Q5. If anyone out there is equally pissed off by Audi/Volskwagen — then they can buy a small part of my broken Audi and we will have a BURNING MY AUDI ’ — party. It will be everybody’s revenge against being ‘screwed’ by car companies. The idea for this type of revenge comes from Australia where a guy got pissed off by how badly Chrysler treated him when they sold him a faulty jeep. Have a look at http://www.destroymyjeep.com/. It was a great success and the Jeep-people really regretted treating him badly. If it goes to this, the party will be held on field close to Audi Aubagne where we will have a greeat party around the bonfire when we break and burn my dear ‘AUDI Q5’ and grill sausage from its fire. Lets make it into a celebration of people’s crowdsourcing power against big company dishonesty. For premium donors we will offer free accommodations for a day at our yoga-retreat — see www.wellness-vibes.com. Super premium donors get a full retreat.
Gustaf Kranck (M.Sc.Eng)
For anyone who is technically interested, I here repeat the statement of fact in this case:
- My Audi Q5 2 liter TFSI Engine has a construction error in the coil rings which had resulted in that the coil ring and piston are not ’tightly’ fitted inside the cylinder. The visible sign of this fault is leakage of oil because oil leaks between the piston and cylinder wall. The invisible result is a longterm change of cylinder preassure. Every Audi certified service dealer knows about this because Audi has accepted responsibility in several countries and class-action suits. Below some links to this:
http://www.a5oc.com/forums/a5-general-q/90849-2-0-tfsi-oil.html
2. I did point this out before the Audi 100 000 km service that my engine had this problem and it was leaking more oil than a standard engine
3. When you make a 100 000 km service the software automatically is updated and its parts — like ignition software are checked and updated. If the service company is ‘careless’ or the service person is an amateur (which personnell admitted to me he was) then he did not take into account the known production fault — and hence installed the ‘normal factory ignition parameters’ for my engine.
4. When I picked up the car — after 2 km drive — I have a recording of the sound of the car that very clearly shows that there is something wrong with ignition = ignition parameters. When ignition is occuring at the wrong paramenters (=the cylinder explosion is for instance a fex microseconds wrong) then there is a enormous faulty preassure in the cylinder.
Here is the video and sound of my engine, recorded 30 minutes after picking up the car from Audi Aubagne Service:
5. After a short driving the spark-plugs broke because of this faulty preassure that in turned caused by faulty ignition timing parameters and the effect on the cylinder and coil is like having a extra bomb going off inside the engine. The result is that cylinder walls and piston are damaged. The only thing the three experts this fas had been able to confirm is that this is what happended to two cylinders my car.
Here is how my ‘brand new’ spark plugs looked liked after the engine exploded — the ends are broken on both:
