My complaints about Medium are growing shrill, even to my own ears. It seems clear I like it here and am staying for the summer. I am finding a fair amount of funny, but really my appetite is insatiable. All I want to do is read silly things.
This is an Internet community that seems to lack all of the essential ingredients of an Internet community. I’ve already talked about the dearth of bad poetry, but this joint lacks commenters, trolls, memes, cat pictures, flame wars, and Elvish. Yes, you heard me right, I said “Elvish”. I’ve never read more stories on the Internet devoid of Klingon and Elvish than I have here, so I have to ask; what the fuck is wrong with you people and what are you doing on the Internet?
Let’s get the ball rolling. Medium needs some fan fiction. I’m sure you all know what I’m talking about. Wait, maybe you don’t. In this freakish, alternate universe perhaps there are Internet authors who don’t know about fan fiction. Seems incredible, but, then again, I never thought people could write so much about full stack marketing, so maybe we’re all learning something. I’ll explain. Fan Fiction is when you take characters you love and make them do what you want (like, you know, put on swim fins and football helmets and drink absinthe smoothies), usually with complete disregard for their actual character or the writing style that gave birth to them. At…
