Yes, We Believe That Pizza Is Meh
Willy Staley

Well, I agree. Pizza is Meh. I would elaborate, but given my response to the Leah Finnegan’s Egg Sandwich Gawker article, I’ve kind of boxed myself out of saying anything.

Having been one of the puffy white men who fetishizes pizza, hot dogs, bacon-egg-and-cheese-on-a-roll, etc. for my entire life, I have to say that I can’t stand listening to other puffy white men discuss these things. I know where you can get a good rueben, white clams on pasta, old-school Chinese where the hot mustard is served in a bowl, etc. etc. There are two reasons I don’t like to talk about these things. 1. The opinions of other puffy white guys on what constitutes a “good” version of the above don’t matter to me. 2. If I tell you where to get them there may be a line when I go. I AM interested in what women, people of color, other nationalities (ie people from the Midwest) think about these things because their opinions may be informed by something I don’t know or understand (i.e. celery). Joseph Checkler, I am certain, is not fit to hold my roach-coach seasoned jock strap, and the fact that anyone would listen to him annoys me.
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