The Unparalleled Beauty of Singing Karaoke Through Tears

I’ve never seen this happen before but every time I end up at a karaoke thing, I pray for someone to take the stage and sing whatever it is they are going to sing through honest to god tears streaming down their face.

God, would anything be more pure than someone so clearly on the brink, publicly grasping for an emotional foothold through music? They could sing anything they wanted and I’d love it. Fuck, I’d even listen to The Cure or watch some clueless hot person forget that there’s like a 10 minute* guitar solo in the middle of Sweet Child Of Mine because instead of flailing around with an ironic “sexy” dance like that awkward 10 minutes with no vocals always turns into, they’d just be letting it all out, purging their heart of all the pain through hard cry-dancing. Or maybe not even, maybe their journey includes them collapsed in a pitiful heap on stage, but I know in my heart that the solo will wrap up and Axl’s slow build WHERE DO WE GO NOW will send all of our hearts soaring. WHERE DO WE GO NOW? Fuckin straight to hell, I suppose, because we could all die happy knowing that we witnessed, and in some ways, fueled this karaoke phoenix’s rebirth on this now-hallowed stage.

Or what about Foreigner’s I Want To Know What Love Is, that’d be great too. It’s a little on the nose, but fuck it man, you’re going through fresh heartache and pain, you’re allowed to live on the fucking nose. If I saw someone singing that through tears it would take an army to keep me from screaming along with that chorus as a way to let whatever beautiful, teary-eyed angel singing this know that they’re not alone, that no matter how broken they feel, they will survive.

OH FUCK WHAT ABOUT I WILL SURVIVE.

My point here is that karaoke through tears, at least in the admittedly very specific way I’ve envisioned it**, is one of the most powerful displays of emotion possible. There is little else that can match the sensation of becoming emotionally stronger, and overcoming sadness and pain by embracing it as a singular beautiful moment meant to strengthen your resolve. And if it has a dope soundtrack, all the better.

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*Ok, ok it’s closer to like one minute, but I’ve seen enough of these things where it feels like ten minutes. Remember that part in the Yellow Submarine cartoon where they count to sixty and it takes FOREVER? That’s what watching some embarrassing hot person realizing in the moment how long that guitar solo feels like to me.

**I will admit this vision of mine includes an extremely supportive audience and does not take into consideration any drunk assholes that could ruin your experience, but I guess I’ve been lucky in that most every karaoke environment I’ve been in has ranged from supportive to indifferent, and never to actively rooting against you.

***I know that Wedding Singer clip at the top isn’t exactly karaoke, but it’s that clip that makes me think about singing karaoke through tears.