Appreciating the Small Details
Our agenda is getting bigger and more complicated each day. Our brain is being forced to focus on so many different transactions through our senses, all at the same time. We are exposed to so much information that produces massive number of entangled thoughts and feelings — Well.. Mainly because of our tendency to say ‘Yes’ to the black hole of social media and news feeds.
Don’t get me wrong, I am not against the social media by ANY means. I so much like social media being the leader factor for the increased awareness towards the global problems, contribution to the personal perception for design, nature, food, and all the new colours that brings to our lives.
My point is that we are swimming in a pool of excess information, more than we can manage in a healthy way. Consciously learning and getting knowledge on the subjects is one thing, being exposed to distracted information on random stuff is another. One of the main consequences of the massive amount of distracted information is missing out the SMALL details in everyday life that is, for me, the main source of the joy.
I have tendency to see through things, see the deepest parts of people or the most hidden corners of the objects. Until very recently, I was so confident that my interaction with others is deep and I can totally appreciate the elements that make them unique. Not just people, the interaction with my whole environment as well. Being confident and not questioning does prevent you to see the change and the true colours even for yourself. Hence.. I was wrong as I was also distracted by many other indigested information and put less attention to what really matters.
Moving to a new city has created a great opportunity to revisit the ways I shape my priorities and my, so called, strengths and shortfalls. Since I moved to London, I have been taking some notes of the moments that lifted my soul and brightened me up. Not necessarily the things that I have experienced by the first hand, but observing as well.
- A gentle touch of your partner’s fingertips while helping you putting on a necklace.
- Remembering a close friend living overseas and dreaming of the different possible ways of a reunion.
- A warm smile from a stranger while waiting to hop on the bus under the pouring rain. — yes, dripping wet and happy.
- The beautiful melody from a street musician’s violin that the winter wind brings just when you are out of your favourite bookshop.
- Recognizing the water drops on the rose pallets and the crystal reflections with different colours on your way home.
- The happiness in the eyes of a child while clapping a street musician that plays Jazz at the tube station.
- Watching a dancing leaf falling from a plane tree in mid-autumn that reminds you the calmness of the season.
- The smell of the first pumpkin spice latte of the year and thinking ‘how did I survive a whole year without it?’
- The grateful look on your work mate’s face when he realizes you got him his favourite ‘caffeinated’ drink before coming to the office in the morning.
- Saying THANK YOU with a genuine heart to the ones that rekindle the joy and gratitude in you.
- Seeing the first bloom of your house plant and the excitement of giving life to something that beautiful.
- Kindness shown after a rather unpleasant conversation and making sure all parties are alright and peaceful.
Those are the things that I am talking about. Small and does not require much effort (and quite often — none). Right? Even writing and reading a few examples lifts my spirit and brings gratitude to my day.
The below appreciation portrayal of the exquisite beauty of the nature by English writer Lewis Carroll (Charles Lutwidge Dodgson) is just too good:
“I wonder if the snow loves the trees and fields, that it kisses them so gently? And then it covers them up snug, you know, with a white quilt; and perhaps it says, “Go to sleep, darlings, till the summer comes again.”
Travelling to Far East and experiencing the spiritual places, doing bungee jumping, swimming in Pacific Ocean, being promoted in our workplace.. All is great, with no doubts. I do, although, sometimes wonder if it is really healthy to build our satisfaction on those that may depend on the monetary strength, is somehow outside of our control or takes so much effort that may divert our attention from what really matters.
Being aware of the beautiful moments from everyday life, things, people, conversations will increase the quality of our life and our environment as the energy will flow in the intensity of the details. Acknowledging and appreciating the care and interest from another is almost like tying another knot to the strength of our relationship, and cherish the richness of the emotions we have for each other.
It is tough to make habits, surely. Getting rid of them is even harder. ‘Taking things for granted’ is one of the habits that our brain loves the most. Our brain loves adapting as it is very good at it!
For example, think of a moment that you are having a dialogue with a friend in a quiet coffeehouse. When it gets crowded, you start talking louder (often, without even recognizing you are getting louder straightaway) and adapt quickly. Our brain does not do a particularly different job when it comes to getting used to the existence of people and nature around us and our relationship with them. It will adapt itself to get used to what is being given and block our way towards acknowledging the real joy inside.
We need to teach ourselves 1)being aware of the gifts of the day 2)acknowledging the finitude of those 3)appreciating and being GRATEFUL for the opportunity given for the resource of the joy.
A couple of minutes from your life to bring your gratitude out of your heart, and share with the nature’s vulnerable existence and your beloved ones will make a great difference in your mood. This is a way to be our best selves and to bring the best with you wherever you are.
Given the fact that there are more than 80 million neurons in a human brain and various multiplexed parameters in life, we cannot keep the track of or catch every detail. Even if we try and yet find it difficult to see the details to appreciate, that is PERFECTLY fine. As long as we try to see, it will come to us at some point.
To quote Northrup Christiane:
Feeling grateful or appreciative of someone or something in your life actually attracts more of the things that you appreciate and value into your life.”
I have some awesome friends that I love being with, and a couple of them are not even interested in those details of which I am grateful. You know what? This is OKAY. I am the one who lacks the ability to see those in some others’ lives. There is no end to this — which is perfect! It means there is more to come..
While making the last bit of editing to this article, the ladies sitting in the next table were enjoying a beautiful bunch of flowers. They were thankful that they could afford to buy it and enjoy taking photo with its shiny colours. This brought freshness and joy to my day. What about your day and the moments it generously offers?
