My Wife Is Depressed What Should I Do: My Wife Is Depressed and I Can’t Take It Anymore

Hailey Sadie
Nov 3 · 7 min read
Photo by Chris Arock on Unsplash

My wife is depressed what should I do — My wife is depressed and i can’t take it anymore.

Living with a depressed wife can make a marriage feel like living in hell. The condition may make her unresponsive to your romantic advances. Furthermore, she may not feel like having fun with you and that can help to create a boring relationship.

If your wife is depressed, here are a few things you can do to help you deal with the situation.

1. Find Out What Is Happening
Most people who are depressed do not feel comfortable to open up to others because they fear they will be judged or ridiculed when they express their feelings and when they reveal their thoughts. However, you have to try to get her to open up to you because depression is one of the leading risks for suicide.

So, have a date at home with her one evening, or take her to her favorite restaurant, put your arms around her, reassure her of your love for her, and coax her to tell you why she is feeling so sad, whether she is thinking of killing herself, what you are doing or not doing that makes her feel miserable, and what she thinks you can do to make her feel better.

2. Speak Words Of Encouragement Into Her Soul
Sometimes all that a depressed wife needs to help lift her spirit are words of love and encouragement from her husband.

So grab her hands once in a while, smile at her, look deep into her eyes, tell her she is a beautiful woman. Say something such as this to her, “Darling, you are looking exquisitely immaculate! You are still the most beautiful woman on earth! I still love you and I will continue to love you forever! Honey, you have been a tower of strength and a great support to me and I want to say I thank you for all your help. Sweetheart, things will be fine! Trust me! There is hope for the future, okay? Better days will come. You are full of life. Enjoy that life! Enjoy the birds singing, the sun shining, the trees dancing in the breeze, the love of our friends, God’s love and avoid living in your head. You are a beautiful soul. Let others continue to enjoy your inner beauty. You have so much to give to the world. Please don’t shut yourself in.”

3. Encourage Her To Reminisce
A study published by the US National Library of Medicine suggests that helping someone to reminisce can help that person to deal with depression.

Reminiscing stimulates the brain and makes it boost its production of feel good hormones such as serotonin an dopamine and the effect of these hormones make one feel happy and hopeful.

So, regularly, let’s say once a week, sit down in your sitting room with your wife, affirm your love for her, give her a loving kiss, and together recount the happy events that have occurred in your marriage, such as the day you first met, how beautiful she was looking, the buildup to your wedding day, the positive feelings in your body on your wedding day, the pleasure you enjoyed during your honeymoon, the joy you experienced on the day your first child was born, splendid vacations you have enjoyed, great meals she has cooked for you to enjoy, how great a wife and mother she is and things like that. The good memories will help her to feel good again and she will find it easier to enjoy the present.

4. Help Your Wife To Focus On Her Strengths And Not Her Weaknesses
Hormonal imbalances and negative thought patterns most often make depressed wives think that they are useless, worthless, bad wives, bad mothers, and terrible human beings.

However, when you remind your wife often that she has strengths, when you remind her of the wonderful things she has done for you and for others and that she has been a great woman before and she can be a great woman again, it will help her to start questioning her negative thoughts.

Questioning her thoughts will make her see that she is not that worthless and that will make it easier for her to shift her mental perspective and see that she has some great qualities. Consequently, she will experience a self-esteem boost.

Conclusion
If your wife is depressed, pour words of comfort into her soul, make her reminisce often, and remind her that there are some valuable things in her and she will feel better.

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My wife is depressed what should I do — My wife is depressed and i can’t take it anymore

About 50% of the marriages in America end in divorce and yet the hope of every couple who marries is that somehow they can live happily ever after. There are steps a person can take even before marriage — during courtship — that can set the stage for a marriage that lasts. There are certain expectations that should be realized by a couple before entering into marriage which will enable them to weather the adversities that tend to break apart so many marriages.

Whenever I tell people that I’ve been happily married for 36 years, I often get the response, “Wow!” It’s almost like this is something that is abnormal or is virtually impossible in our culture today. Being married to the same person “til death do you part” should be normal — the expectation of every married couple.

I think a fair question to ask if you are contemplating marriage is, “Do I expect this marriage to last?” We have a thing in our culture today called a prenup agreement which I contend is an expectation and recipe for divorce. When my wife and I were considering marriage, we agreed that the word “divorce” would not be in our dictionary. In a sense, it was like burning a bridge behind us — we couldn’t go back. We would make it work no matter what.

Much like anything else in life, entering into the marriage relationship “wisely” prevents many of the situations that can cause distress, disappointment and unhappiness in marriages. I can remember when my wife and I were dating that we spent time discussing our expectations for the future. Sure, there were surprises after the marriage ceremony, but as many possible questions as we could think of were dealt with and agreed upon before we were married. We talked about where we might live, how many children we wanted, what our career aspirations were, what spiritual faith we would follow and try to pass on to our children, etc. We didn’t have formal pre-marital counseling like is available to couples today, but we did work through many of the topics that are commonly covered with such counseling ourselves.

For a marriage to be successful and last, it must be properly prepared for. Therefore, seek counsel from those couples who have made it work — who have successful marriages. Don’t get your attitudes, expectations, or advice about marriage from someone who hasn’t been successful in marriage. Decide together with the person you plan to marry what your want your future together to be like and take advantage of premarital counseling if it is available. It is possible to have a marriage that lasts and that should be the expectation of every couple that marries. It should be “normal.” A marriage that ends in divorce should be “abnormal” or the exception rather than the rule.

Saying or doing the wrong thing can actually cause your spouse to feel even more distant from you. You can make your spouse fall back in love with you, all over again. You don’t have to worry about whether your spouse is on the brink of asking you for a divorce. You can control the situation and use specific techniques to naturally make them fall hopelessly in love with you — Learn More Here

50% of people divorce. Do not be another statistic. You can save your marriage with powerful techniques that will allow you to trust again and ignite the fire and passion back into your relationship. Save your marriage today by visiting RomanceDictionary.com

Looking for love and romance can be challenging. Discuss your marriage problems on our forum. We can help you find a great loving relationship! Go to: RelationshipTalkForum.com



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Hailey Sadie

Written by

I’m a marriage counselor. My advice have helped thousands of couples around the world.

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