10 Things I Have and 10 Things I Haven’t Learned About Cambridge
Jul 22, 2017 · 2 min read
First the “haves”
- DO NOT leave your house on the weekend. Seriously. Unless you want to fight your way through hoards of Chinese tourists in matching tracksuits, avoid the main roads like the plague.
- The weather changes in a split second. Be ready for ANYTHING. (I may or may not have been wearing Rainbows in torrential downpour because it was 70 in the morning and pouring two hours later)
- Cafeteria food is horrid. If there’s anything that says “fish” or “pork” on the menu, RUN AWAY.
- The Mill is always the answer.
- Same goes for Lola Lo’s.
- A cup of tea at Fitzbillie’s always does the trick.
- The outdoor market is a magical, magical place designed to save you from the horrors of the Pembroke cafeteria.
- When you are asked for the millionth (I’m not exaggerating) time if you want to go punting, the easiest way to get them to shut up is by saying that you’ve already been, regardless of if this is true or not.
- Wearing your lanyard around your neck at all times makes you look like a tourist, but the porters will yell at you if you don’t. It’s a catch-22. I’ve chosen the latter.
- It’s an old school. Old school=old pipes, bad wifi, and some of the most beautiful architecture I’ve ever seen. You win some, you lose some.
Now for the haven’t’s
- The biggest mystery of all is WHY IS THE CORPUS CHRISTI CLOCK SO DANG IMPORTANT? Every day I have to fight my way through hoards of tourists taking photos of the thing, but I still can’t figure it out.
- How do you possibly balance your budget with no real way to cook for yourself??
- Why haven’t the British figured out AC? It gets HOT in these third floor rooms.
- Why on earth do people drive/bike like they WANT to run you over?? Just because you can doesn’t mean you should.
- Why doesn’t anything open before 9 or 10 am or stay open past 6?? You would think a coffeeshop would want to take advantage of us poor souls with 8 am classes but nope!
- What is the word for “napkin?” Because napkin in Britain means the sanitary kind, but I haven’t figured out how to ask for a thing to wipe my face off with at mealtimes ya know?
- Why are the water closets so small? I know it says closet but seriously, how do you people fit in these things?
- If four weeks is a normal Cambridge term, HOW DO YOU KEEP THIS UP ALL THE TIME (ok, sorry, finals are getting to me).
- Why do we need to stay off the grass?? Aesthetics? Prestige? Tourists who would completely ruin the landscaping?
- Finally, HOW DO I STAY FOREVER?
