Are you proud of who you have become?

We’re bombarded with self-improvement books, articles, videos, training courses, and more these days.

It’s easy to be led to believe we’re not good enough — in all aspect of our lives. I guess this is probably true for anyone with ambition to become a better person.

We must work on becoming better people, in my opinion. I’m yet to come across a person who has it all figured out. I know I don’t have much figured out yet.

As long as you live, keep learning how to live — Seneca

Throughout history we’ve been told that we suck, and that we must do this or that to be better human beings. I can’t think of an ancient culture, scripture, story, book, folklore, that doesn’t include self-improvement teachings.

We’re learning so much about the ‘human condition’ that it’ll be downright foolish to think we have it figured out. We circle back to what was — with good reason — and we try again. Modern science and technology guide us forward.

The amount of ink spilled on a daily basis on the subject (including my own thoughts here) is proof that we’re nowhere near satisfied with our own behaviour, or the behaviour of society in general. With good reason.

Can we please stop showing people how to feel good, and then tell them to feel bad!

When I read the question ‘Are you proud of who you have become?’ recently, I knew the article was going to tell me I should be ashamed, get my shit together, and be better in some way.

And it did.

Am I really that pathetic?

I thought I’d rather look into doing a weekly/monthly audit, asking the question of myself. What would/should a self-assessment like that look like?

I’m sure that being able to measure my responses and progress will motivate me to continue growing. Perhaps it can help you too.

What do I want to be known for?

Do I want to be famous? Probably not. Do I want to reach some esteemed status in my career? I don’t think so. But these are the types of questions I need to ask myself. Am I doing something meaningful? Do my actions help others in some way? Am I positively contributing to my friends, my family, my colleagues, my company, my communities, strangers?

How do I want others to describe me?

When people are talking about me, as I’m sure they do, is it positive? I want people to value the time they spend with me, to feel as though they benefited from our interaction. What do I want them to say?

What is my current reality?

How far off am I from the fantasy I hope for in the above two questions? How big is this gap?

What areas do I need to work on?

Based on the gap identified, are there specific actions I can take to reach my fantasy?

What did I do this week to improve my body, my mind, my heart, and my soul?

Being a better person means working on a combination of all of these. What are the things that make me happy? Are they good for me? Am I committing to a training routine to keep my body healthy? What am I reading to sharpen my mind? How am I building and maintaining positive relationships? Am I taking time out for myself?

These are actual questions I’ve been asking myself recently. I should be more consistent in answering them as a self-audit — weekly or maybe even daily.

I clearly don’t have all the answers just yet, but perhaps the more I ask these questions the closer they will get.

And at least I’ve realised the only person I need to answer to is myself.

Do I have all my shit together? No.

Am I pathetic? Definitely not.

Am I perfect? Far from it.

Am I working on myself every day? Yes.

And that’s the only thing that matters.