The Cosby Spiral

Hammerhead Snark
Oct 13, 2016 · 4 min read

After a weekend of our political media attempting to figure out how to say the word ‘pussy’ on the six o’clock news and a debate that was pretty much like watching a mentally deficient coke addict berate your grandmother for ninety minutes, it seemed like things would settle down. The ‘pussygate’ tape was a big deal because it had pictures and sounds. Yes, it was shocking, but it was not surprising. Trump’s been saying shit that would get you fired from your job at McDonald’s for more than a year now — the tape just crystallized it.

But on Monday and Tuesday, there was… nothing. Lots of stories about civil war in the GOP, but no new major calamities to drive us to our next schadengasm. Like heroin fiends craving our next fix, we all awaited the next tape. “There are more!” rumors said. But instead, we just got a drip, drip, drip of old stories. CNN did some minor trawling through old Howard Stern bits to discover that Trump told Stern it was okay to call his daughter a ‘piece of ass’. Which we already knew. Republicans started to catch their breath. Wednesday came around, with no new major revelations. Those who fled Trump were now being punished by his most brainwashed acolytes, and as a result, some were reendorsing Trump cautiously. Dozens of ‘flip-flopper’ ads went into the hopper, and Democrats prepared to hang Trump around the the necks of various GOP candidates in unsafe districts like an anchor made of raw sewage. But at least, the GOP figured, things had slowed down. Maybe the worst was behind them. Trump was almost certain to lose the election, but maybe they could hold onto their dignity and, quite possibly, hold onto what should have been an easy task — a ridiculously gerrymandered house.

Meanwhile the drip, drip, drip kept coming from the dam, and tonight it broke. It broke in such a careful, deliberate, and focused way that hardcore presidential campaign veterans were in awe. If Clinton runs the country the way her oppo team played Trump, she will deserve to be on Mount Fucking Rushmore. Here’s the quick hits of the cosby-like avalanche that started today… all of which are going to make a great web commercial set against his insistence at the debate that no events described in his ‘locker room talk’ ever transpired — a denial he only announced after Anderson Cooper hammered him on it like a drum. Buckle up tight, because no amount of Tic-Tacs is going to get rid of the bad taste all these stories are going to leave in your mouth.

And now people are bringing up old accusations. Jill Harth. Ivanka Trump. Temple Taggart. A friend of CNN anchor Erin Burnett. And, of course, the accusation of a 13-year old at a Jeffrey Epstein sex party.

All of THOSE allegations were made before ‘Grab them by the pussy’.

This has created a bunker-like mentality on the Trump campaign, which right now must feel like a Downfall video shot at the Playboy mansion. They have started to fight back.

Meanwhile, the memes and jokes just keep coming. Rush Limbaugh is complaining about how boring it is to get consent to avoid rape. Oh, and remember those rumors that more is coming? Yeah, those rumors are still lingering.

Beyond that, all I have to say is that the historic event of the first female president deserves better than this election. We all do.

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