why everyone must learn to embrace criticism….

Artists should be criticized mercilessly and they should also be told why they’re being criticized.

I hate criticism especially when it’s levied at me. I hate it with a vengeance and I despise the person criticizing me, yet I still insist that artists should be criticized.

I wish I had been criticized so much that I had stopped wanting to be an artist. I wish I had been ruthlessly stripped of all my day dreams about being an actor and I wish I had been forced to ask myself this question time and time again –

If not an actor, what use are you to this world?

What service am I providing by being an artist?

All actors, musicians and entertainers will never be able to answer this question without being stumped for a second.

“Wait, what?

Service?

I have to think about you?

But this is all about me?

Therein lies the single reason why artists are the highest paid, yet the most criminally useless people on earth. Can we honestly say that the actor who appears in one film per year that entertains the average public for two hours and twenty minutes, is more important to a functioning society than teachers, scientists, pharmacists, soldiers, nurses, fire fighters, engineers? These are the services with maximum impact for the betterment of civilization and yet aren’t most of them criminally underpaid. I honestly believe that a teacher should be paid as much of the 30-crore salary that Ranbir Kapoor was paid for his two years spent working on “Animal.”

A good teacher imparts knowledge, shapes young minds, develops future resources, acts as a role model, sets performance benchmarks for a child to perform for the rest of their lives. No actor has ever thought of his or her performance in such a way. In fact, most of them make terrible role models. They also make deeply disturbed people, almost unable to function in the real world. Take away the one avenue for them to feel good about themselves, and they cannot function as human beings.

This is why I believe that those children who show inclinations towards arts should be grilled into understanding that just because they are practicing the art, doesn’t make their art unique.

The ‘uniqueness’ of art in my opinion comes from two things

1. The unique perspective of an artist, which comes from

2. The unique life experience of the artist.

Life experience means the actual experience of living a real life. Being a real person. Someone who has to understand at a very young age, that their survival depends on their utility and their efficacy, not their personality. The person has to earn his place in the world. Earn — to pay for his food, housing, clothing. Like 90 percent of the population.

Someone who understands at a deep fundamental level, that just because they ‘will’ it, their day dream doesn’t deserve to come true. Like everything else, their day dream will need to be earned too.

It’s a lesson that I’ve learned the hard way.

I am an actor. I was always an actor. Even when I wasn’t an actor, I was an actor. Even when I was living in Ludhiana and working ten hours a day in a chemical laboratory on the first floor of a dyeing factory. We made wool samples of different colours for hosiery factories to choose from, I was, unfortunately, even then, a performer.

Sometimes I feel, it’s a curse I wish I never had, and It’s a disease that I wish I never contracted. This incomprehensible, performers — ‘bug’, numbs you, it fools you. It consumes you to daydream, while it drowns all reason, intellect and logic. You keep thinking your dreams will come true, all the while ignoring all the signs, that things are not going your way. Everything is a ‘sign’, everything is a step away from the next big break. There are enough examples of other stars who had been down at the dumps before the one miracle or one big break turned their world upside down.

I do wish that I had been criticized to the point of me asking myself,

What else am I good at?

What else could I do that would be of some help to someone — anyone, in my life? Something, that would not be about ‘personal’ glory, but about solving someone else’s problem. It could be as simple as becoming a tuition teacher to teach children writing skills (something I would love to do now) or learning coding so I could revolutionize new mobile phones in the future.

Anything,

Other than, “Watch me, how fabulous I am!! And now pay me!

I wish all artists would be criticized to the point of exploring their lives to be functional instead of glamourous, advantageous to others instead of self-serving. Maybe what I am saying is cruel, because artists are fragile and vulnerable. But trust me, the sooner you lose your fragility for honesty, the better. Do not substitute kindness for blindness.

Here is why you must learn to accept cruel criticism and not break down every time you get a negative comment.

1. To get over yourself and get into yourself.

All art, including entertainment is functional, it serves a purpose. It is also mostly disposable. Criticism will get you to understand that. Get over the fact that you have a talent that the world must respond to. Be the person who responds to the world. Be of service. It will humble you; it will frighten you. It will force you to dig deeper and discover more about what you are capable of. Share what you discover with the world as a service. Make the money. Rich artists are happier artists.

2. To understand your why;

If cruel criticism makes you want to quit, then know that resilience was never really one of your qualities. Trust me when I say that most people who teach you a particular art, NEVER teach you the mind set required to pursue that art for the rest of your lives. That mindset will force you to understand how badly you want it. It will obsessively make you find all the resources you need to do that. And It’s absolutely alright to discover that it wasn’t a matter of life and death for you. It will save you years of heartbreak.

3. To grow up -

A grown-up person isn’t reactive, she is productive. A grown-up person knows the difference between ambition and acceptance. A grown-up person understands the difference between criticism and vindictiveness. A grown up continues to persevere in the face of obstacles but isn’t foolish to confuse optimism with fatuousness. A grown-up person is an artist because of his life condition, not in spite of it.

An artist must accept that nothing is in waiting. There is no — next big break — You may get one if you’re lucky and that would be fantastic.

But till that happens. This is all there is. You’re not an artist waiting…. to reach their ‘potential.’

This is the real life of a person. You at this moment in time. Right now.

And if you’re not providing anything, you’re not receiving anything.