My Problems With Life Advice

Life you tell me is full of wonder and amazement and my actions however minute they might be have significance you say . You with your promise of happiness - provided I don’t ask much of life , you with your ethos of "come what may" and "everything happens for a reason" . I want everything of life , I want it now , I want everything completed and total otherwise I will reject it. I will not be moderate. I want to be sure of everything , I want to know my actions matter , I will not accept it half baked . You tell me the void is inevitable and enjoy the journey. I say fuck it , I will be like Mozart and Beethoven I will fight against my fate even if I fail I’ll have died with the satisfaction that I tried . But then again my cynicism hides my fear , it hides my fear of being forgotten for in the grand scheme of the universe my entire life is but a second, why do I work for that one instant of time that the universe might not remember unless I can turn this one second into the birth of a singularity .So I want to be sure of everything this very instant , sure that I am that singularity. If not then I want to die for what is one little existence in the grand scheme of things.

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