The Beautiful Little Boy Whom has No idea How he Inspires.

Goodness gracious

You are so precious

And I say it out loud

Just like that.

You’re so tiny

Unpretentious

Threatening to move me

And Like Rosa parks

I won’t go back.

You offer a centimeter

Of goodness

I swear- you’re whole, innocent, true

And I can’t help but to squint my eyes

Cause I was once innocuous like you.

You’ll find your way

I’m sure of it

Avoid all of those

Whom are counterfeit

Train your mind

To be free of it

Free of your own mind

And the lies it tries to make you omit or commit.

You love so hard

And touch so sweet

You show it with movement

Not verbally

Cause your tongue is still tied

But it won’t always be

And then you’ll need to remember

To speak carefully.

I hope you make the right choice

I hope you always think of others

I hope you can hear your own voice

I hope you choose the right words

And I really, truly, wishfully, hope you take care of my brother.

He’s a wandering dog in a tornado

Looking for shelter

Stepping outside of the confines

He’s targeted by the anger he stows

And his driven nature can swelter

But he’ll always catch you just in time.

He loves you more than any mouth could every say

I mean it, he told me that day

It was spring time in 2013

He put a phone call out to me

I was a legal assistant then, hating my job

him and I were distant, even then we could not settle or squash

Our differences and our resentments

And all the pain we still choose to lodge

Him calling was uncommon as even then we rarely spoke

He told me you were growing

Inside the womb of a woman I didn’t even know.

That day, that day in spring of 2013

He did not tell me the most beautiful part

That when he saw a semblance of the first image of you

His cried sapphire tears and he literally put his hand to his own heart

Your mother told me this, a year later or so

It brought a smirk to my brain

Appropriately so

He really does love you

No matter where each of your lives go

Is it strange that I write this poem

Even when everything is fine?

I’m just always worried for the outcome

In this perverted murky life

I hope you read this when you’re older

I hope you’re willing to take the time

But maybe there are too many words

And you’ll ever so consistently be in flight.

My hope is that you pause long enough

To become who you ought to be

I hope your skin is always protected from the sun

But you still glow oh so effortlessly.

I might never get to be a part of you

Understandably so it is

I might never get to be the glue

That helps your father, mother and I stick

Cause relatives are humans too

And I refuse to live anywhere near your town

The seasons become shorter

While every year the cost of life goes down.

Your father is the smartest

The smartest man that I have ever met

He’ll make you rich & keep you comfortable

And he wouldn’t dare ever leave or quit.

He’s also somewhat shattered

But maybe you’ll never get to see that side

He never had a father like you get to have

And I know it burns him up inside.

So this will go one of two ways

And I already know the way that it will go

He will try harder than any lamentation that’s laid

And he will always worship you much more than you know.

Its little humans like you

Yeah, you help me to believe

That prudence and trust and security and a safe touch

Are the things which we actually need

The aforementioned adjectives

They are what push us each to thrive

So as you read these words I pray to the creator that I am still alive

We might never see eye to eye

I might not be around very often

But I met you once when you were young

And my heart; it somehow softened

Your aunt is a wintry witch

But for you I will only ever be sincere and warm

There will be many stories, you can choose to grasp or pitch

And pretending I don’t exist will likely be the norm

But let me tell you a few things

I’m not a victim and I’m not a saint

I just let life get in the way

I let my life get in the way

Your daddy says I’m wasted potential

That I could have been a star and that I should have been

He hates to see me wreck my life

And that point I cannot argue with

But he was once destitute as well

And I pulled him out of it

But as far as I can tell

I give myself far far far too much credit

Because a higher entity is what really saved him

But sometimes I tell myself that it was I

Who picked him up and dried him off

And told him to search the ins and outs, the lows and the highs

Cause your father; he’s the most talented man

That I have ever known

But he will try to tell you that somehow I taught him

Everything that he now knows

I didn’t; I didn’t teach him to write, run with agility and throw

Born with those gifts he was bestowed

And I hope he passes them on to you

Don’t let him tell you that I made him

Cause it’s just a dishonest, insecure truth

I couldn’t carry our belongings

And that’s why I’m struggling now

But maybe by the time you read this

I’ll have overcome it all somehow.

I’ll probably never be in Texas

I hate that dry and muddled place

I know it’s your home

I know it’s your state

But I wish that Florida was allowed to show you its grace

There are flowers here

We’re not perfect, I assure you

But the ocean sweeps whether or not you choose to weep

And the tides and waves, the salted water here can cure you.

Of that I am convinced

Of that I am sure

When you read this I could be a success

Or I could be laying on an insane asylum’s floor.

I might be gone for good or gone for winter

Using my own teeth to remove my own self made splinters

But no matter where I am

No matter what I do

No matter who I became

Or what I put anyone else around us through

No matter the words that come to be spoken

Or the judgments passed for what I’ve done or do

I will always share some of your blood

And will walk this warped and awry path with you

My legs will lift, each one, by one

My heart will sink, just like it’s always done

And you can smile or frown or yell or scream

The noises that you choose don’t matter a single bit to me

If you become a lawyer, or a doctor or business man just like your father

Or maybe you’ll play football or another sport, or hey, become an author

You might simply use your brains, your wit, your vigalent and pristine eyes

Or you might use your arms, your back, your brute strength, your lungs

Whatever you do, please never bother

To ask me what I think of what you’ve become

I don’t care what you do

I don’t care how important you are

The amount of money you make is useless information to me

Cause you’re the brightest, most affluent star

That you are, that you are

Please go out and walk this globe

And keep your retinas moist and alert

This world will try to break you

The truth of life will breach you, crack and fracture, yes, it will hurt

But you’re strong and you are sturdy

You are blessed without a need to convert

But the tides of reality will try to convince you

Yes they will holler, sever, influence and try to assert

But your home isn’t a physical structure

It’s the one that lurks when no one really is around

I promise if you follow your uncontaminated little heart

You’ll be the wealthiest boy in town.