Drama & Attachment Part 3 - People Addiction
Addiction to other people can be one of the most psychologically damaging experiences we could ever go through. It is both subtle and pervasive, and we often go through years of intense drama without ever realizing why it is occurring. It is important to step back and reflect on the relationships we have with the people in our lives, especially those that are closest to us, so as to identify these addictions and attachments before the unconscious damage becomes too much to bear.
All too often, we mistake addiction for love. We put ourselves in positions where we ending up needing this other person, where we cannot function without them. We sacrifice our well being, and claim that we cannot live without this person, all in the name of romanticism and love. However, this is not True Love, as True Love cannot manifest without Love for one Self.
Let’s take a step back to examine what True Love entails. When you truly Love someone, you would do whatever it takes to enable this person to fully manifest themselves into their highest being. You would want them to be free, to be happy, to rise above. There’s no way this can happen if this person has to constantly deal with your co-dependencies, if you are always draining their energy to sustain your being, if their inner journey becomes entangled with yours. They cannot fly with you weighing them down. As such, the very acts that you often commit in the name of love are actually destroying it.
But how can we avoid co-dependency and addiction? By remembering that you should Love Yourself first. When you Love Yourself, you no longer need someone else to sustain your energy and happiness. You become the energy source. When both parties truly Love themselves, it creates an environment where True Love can actually manifest, as in its core it is a collaborative act. From an experiential standpoint, it allows you to truly appreciate this person for who they really are, as you are no longer perceiving them through the filters of needs and wants. It allows you to be your best self, and it allows them to be their best self, and when you two are together you can both be at your best, shining together, lighting up the world. That is what True Love is.
Take the time to analyze your relationships today, both with your loved ones and with yourself.
Let go of your attachments. Set your loved ones free, so that you can be free.
Then we can all be free together.