How to Prepare for Meetings in order to Advocate Effectively — a three part approach.

What’s your favourite sandwich? Most likely what comes to mind will be the filling…maybe it’s tuna…or jam…or bacon, brie & cranberry if you’re feeling festive.🥪

But the reality is that whilst the filling might be the bit we focus upon, the bread either side is equally important in determining the quality of the sandwich. A jam sandwich on thickly sliced bloomer is very different experience to a jam sandwich on two slices of slightly stale crusts.🍞

Similarly we can think of the meeting as the filling of the sandwich — the bit we focus on & the bit for which we have high hopes.

But it’s equally important to consider how we prepare for & follow up that meeting in order for advocacy to be successful.

I’ll be exploring tips for advocating effectively during a meeting & following up for maximum impact in future articles but firstly, how can you prepare for a meeting in order to advocate effectively?

When I support clients to prepare for a meeting we work through a three part process: look back, look forwards then come into the present.

1. Look Back: the aim of this is to remind yourself of what’s previously been covered in meetings or conversations & what’s been agreed or identified as effective practice for your child.

• Check minutes of the previous meeting (& any other relevant meetings) & remind yourself of what actions were allocated & to who? Make a note of any questions you have in relation to these actions.
• Ensure you have any relevant paperwork to hand and reread this to remind yourself of what has previously been agreed or recommended. Sometimes a suggestion might get lost if it was made a while back but still be relevant.
• If your child has a communication passport or pupil profile & it’s relevant to the meeting, check whether this is uptodate. These documents are only useful if they’re current. If your child’s interests, what they find difficult or what supports them effectively has changed make a note & let school know.

2. Look forwards: sometimes you can have a head full of ideas & points which feel important to cover. To get the most out of the meeting I support clients to clarify which of those points are most relevant to this particular meeting & which are most important to address. Take time to reflect & consider:

• What points do you want to cover?
• Do you have any concerns you need to raise? If you have a number of concerns jot these down & look for any themes so you can address these points together.
• Identify which are the key points which absolutely must be covered & which will you raise if time permits. Remember, it’s better to agree fewer actions which will make the most difference than to agree a list of actions where the key ones might get lost.
• Consider sharing any key points or questions with others, e.g. professionals, ahead of the meeting. It can be so easy to forget, particularly when advocacy feels like a fight, but your aim is to get answers & move things forwards not catch people out. By sharing these points ahead of the meeting you give others opportunity to reflect & identify possible solutions or gather additional information if that will be required.

3. Come into the present: when our brain is stressed & in ‘fight or flight’ mode it’s harder for it to think or communicate clearly & it’s harder for us to work effectively with others to find solutions & possible ways forwards. You are more likely to achieve the outcomes you want (& less likely to burn out) if you take time to deliberately move your brain into a calm state:

• Take time to reflect & identify what helps you to feel calmer. Just ahead of the meeting allow time to get to a place where you feel calm & collected. Rather than dashing to the meeting straight from work some of my clients use breathing exercises or meditation to help them feel calmer, might factor in half an hour for a walk, 10 minutes for a cup of tea or just take 5 minutes put down their phone & just stop. From this place you’ll be able to think more clearly & be better placed to advocate effectively.

By approaching meetings using this structure you can achieve greater clarity & ensure that meetings actually move things forwards for your child.

Do you have any other top tips for preparing for meetings? I’d love to hear them & if you want to find out more about how I can help you advocate effectively for your child why not email hello@jodiewarren.com to arrange your free, initial consultation call?

I support parents at the start of their SEND journey to understand their child’s needs in order to support & navigate the SEND system calmly, confidently & effectively.

Join my free facebook support group for parents here:

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