Do it your way (please)

I want to share a story with you, about a client I’m working with at the moment, and an issue she’s been battling with in her startup. The reason I want to share it with you is because I’ve walked through exactly the same situation myself, and watched many other clients struggle with it too. It feels like perhaps, this is a lesson we can all learn from.

Let me explain : This client is incredible at what she does. Seriously incredible. But when I first met her, she was spinning. Her head had been filled with so many ‘shoulds’ that she was starting to question whether she was even on the right path.

She’d met a whole bunch of people who were really excited about her work. People who had more experience than her. People who genuinely wanted to help. And so, all these lovely people started telling her what to do. Giving her really pointed business advice — You absolutely have to do this. Oh my goodness, this needs to be your priority. You can’t do that until you’ve done this.

I’ll give you a few examples: She’s a coach, and she was being told she absolutely needed to have a VIP program. That she needed to write a sales page a zillion miles long, listing all her free bonuses. That she should be setting up her calls in this way, or that way. That she needed to come out of the gates with 3 programs. That she needed to word her offerings in a particular way.

Holy smokes.

Let me tell you something about this kind of situation. It immediately puts you on the back foot. It makes you feel like you couldn’t possibly know what the best plan of attack is, because clearly, all these people know more than you.

When you’re starting out in business it’s easy to fall into the trap of putting people on pedestals. Thinking that someone is the absolute guru of your industry and that you couldn’t possibly know as much as them.

But here’s lesson number one : Please please please don’t discount your own abilities & talents. Just because someone has had huge success in business doesn’t mean you should hand over your power to them. By all means, find mentors who can help you grow, but don’t allow yourself to shrink in their presence.

Oh, and whilst we’re at it, lesson number two : Remember that there is never just one way of doing something. In fact, if you start to believe that there’s only one way of doing something, you’re almost guaranteed to fail.

Because we all have different strengths & weaknesses. We all have different perspectives and different experiences to draw from. What feels like a perfect fit for me might feel uncomfortable for you. And vice versa.

I remember when I first started my business feeling overwhelmed by all the noise. Making constant lists of things that I needed to do. Things that other people were telling me were absolutely vital to grow my business. Things like running webinars, building a huge email list, selling online products, having a zillion followers on social media.

Good grief. It’s enough to make you curl up in a ball and cry.

And so, after a brief period of trying to do all the things (and failing miserably) I realised that maybe, just maybe, I should try doing it my way. And so I did.

I ignored all the noise. I let go of everyone else’s viewpoints (what a freaking relief) and started leaning into what felt good. I built my program the way I thought it should be built. I wrote my sales pages the way I would want to read them. I rid myself of the ridiculous guilt for not having a massive email list, and just focused on writing good things for the few people who wanted to read them.

And four things happened :

I felt a crazy amount of weight being lifted off my shoulders — Yay ! You mean I don’t have to become one of those awful sales-y people ramming products & services down potential clients throats and shouting at the top of my voice how f&*king awesome I am ?! Thank goodness.

Work became fun again — Huh, funnily enough, when I stepped off the crazy train, work felt good again. Why ? Well, for starters, I was aligned with my values and my business had integrity. But really, it came down to the fact that I was doing it my way, which, let’s be honest, always feels good !

I found my voice — Once I started walking down my own path (and at times, having to create a brand new one), I became more confident just being me. I was no longer trying to be like anyone else, or follow anyone else’s rules, which meant my brand reflected me.

I gained more traction — My business started to grow. Not in the six-figures-in-six-weeks kinda way, but at a slow and steady pace. And you know what I’ve realised? Slow and steady really does win the race. It’s way more sustainable, and it teaches you patience and humility (both epic traits for any entrepreneur).

Which brings me full circle back to my awesome client. Here’s what’s happening now. We’ve thrown out the rule book. We put everyone else’s opinions, business plans & priorities to one side. We’re creating a path for her that feels good, that suits her and that reflects her brand. And let me tell you something…. this is what trailblazing looks like.

I’ll leave you with a little something from the always epic Dr. Seuss :

“You have brains in your head. You have feet in your shoes. You can steer yourself any direction you choose. You’re on your own. And you know what you know. And YOU are the one who’ll decide where to go…”

Do it your way (please) April 28th, 2016 Linzi