One Sunday, bored and anxious for the upcoming Monday, I was furiously swiping on Tinder. After 20–30 swipes to the right, I saw her. With her golden hair, she was like a drop of sun. She had a friend beside her. In the next photo, she had her friend from the first photo and another friend of her. One more tap on the right, and another picture of her friend from the first photo, this time by herself. It took 2 taps for me to figure out Laura, was not the name of my future wife. She was a friend of her.
I had to figure out a way to find her. The woman of my life who I don’t know her name.
First, I looked for Laura’s profile to see if she has her Instagram linked to her Tinder. I could have seen all her photos and search for my love there. But she was not one of those who is on tinder to have more Instagram followers.
Laura was a freelance writer & actor & babysitter. She studied in NYU, and she asked the men that they must love dogs. I googled the keywords, Laura, writer, actor, NYU. I didn’t use the word babysitter to keep my search a little less creepy. I’ve checked all the results, Lauras on Facebook and Google images. She was not around. I was not able to recognize her, and there are too many Lauras who are writers and actors from NYU.
I took a screenshot of Laura’s photo with my sweetheart, cropped Laura from the photo and run a reverse google image search. Google captured my darling’s photo with the keyword girl and showed me many women who don’t look like her at all but have great hair. Most of the images were from Pinterest lists showing top haircuts of 2017. My digital Sharlok Holmes skills didn’t work. I failed.
There was nothing left to do except matching with Laura. The plan was short and stupid. I had to wait 23h 34m 42secs to earn another super like, super like Laura, hope that she would like me back, talk with her and convince her to introduce me to my little cupcake.
As you already know that this story has a happy ending, sure Laura swiped right, and I’ve met with my sugar cube.
However, there is one thing I learned in my life, my dear readers. Straightforward, honest, romantic moves are only accepted if you are Hugh Grant, John Cusack or any romantic comedy actor (or actress of course but I relate to those two for now).
Yes, Laura swiped right. Without giving any more false hope to Laura (that’s how I felt, but probably for her, I was one of the hundreds of matches) told her my intentions about my spring breeze. She did write me back in about 23 minutes. Just enough time to watch one more episode of The Office. Yes, that’s what I do when I am waiting for something anxiously and want to pass the time faster, I watch The Office again and again. She replied “WTF.” At that moment I understood all the romantic comedies I watched were lies. They were really just movies.
I can feel you saying so how did you reach to your, well probably another cheesy love word indicating my wife.
One night after she wrote to me WTF, she was having drinks with friends. She pulled her phone and told the situation, showing how creepy I was. Luckily my wife was also at the party. And she saw me, I mean my Tinder profile. First, she couldn’t say anything. That night when everybody went to their homes she texts to Laura and asked her to give her number to me.
The rest is history.
