Things to Do When You’re 20 and Anxious About the Future

We’ve all been there. We’ve all thought about it.
The thoughts arise innocuously while we are standing in the kitchen, trying to choose between ramen and peanut butter for breakfast. Why are we struggling to put one foot in front of the other, frantically searching for a job we don’t hate to save for a house we can’t even afford? Why are we struggling when our peers are succeeding and thriving based on their LinkedIn posts?
We are often swimming in self-doubt, wondering how we’ve passed 20 without being on a Top 20 Under 20 list. Or more infuriatingly, how have others managed to get there?
It’s easy to have anxiety about the future, especially when it feels like everyone else has already started moving and left you in the dust. The future is an uncontrollable black hole of questions.
There’s a few things I’ve been trying to curb the anxiety — maybe it can help you too.
- Build A Time Machine
No better cure for worrying about the future than seeing it yourself! Bust out that dusty time machine and propel yourself to 2026 and take a peek at adulthood.
No? Founding a startup for time travel not feasible? Ok, let’s give this another shot.
2. Write Down Your Possible Future
Bust out a pen and paper and start writing. Jot down ideas of what your future can look like. Write about different career paths, different skills you want to learn, different lifestyles, different hobbies. Impractical or practical, write them all!
Now take another look. Tweak it. So maybe being the first corn farmer on Mars isn’t feasible but that doesn’t mean that you can’t become an expert in corn sowing methods in arid conditions and make it a point to get on Elon Musk’s first public convoy to Mars.
Focus on what you want and remove anything that you added because you’re “supposed to want it” — this is your life, don’t let other people try to tell you how to live it. Make sure the mistakes you make are yours.
Now you’re left with a large list of possibility. Your future.
It’s still scary but now you physically have a set of dreams that you can pursue. Your list of futures shows you there’s no set path you can follow to happiness and satisfaction, but that’s ok.
3. Be Proud of Yourself
We’ve lived at least 20 long years. Do we congratulate ourselves for being alive in this confusing world?
Not really, we tend to devalue ourselves and our achievements. How have times have you done something and thought, oh anyone could have done this or ah this wasn’t too difficult anyway and you convince yourself you have very little to be proud of.
A good exercise to start valuing yourself more is to accept compliments. It’s small but accepting positive feedback on your skills from other people will help you start accepting that your skills have positive influence.
Someone says you’re good at something? Instead of waving them away and mumbling under your breath unintelligibly, smile and accept the compliment. That’s it. Start small. Every nerve in your body is probably telling you to say, “oh nah, it was no biggie to paint this portrait of my grandmother with my toes while underwater…” but resist the urge to devalue yourself.
This is the perfect use of the phrase, fake it till you make it. It may not work for everything and it may feel forced but that’s how to build up habits and I promise, being proud of your work is a good habit.
4. Take Initiative
This may be a word that’s thrown around a lot, but let’s examine it.
You have the power at your fingertips to learn whatever you want. Instead of binge-watching Gossip Girls, go binge watch How To Play the Guitar or User Experience Design or Machine Learning — try digging further into some of the skills you wrote down in your list of futures.
Any skill you learn contributes to your marketability, so if you’re worried about getting a job, then relax. Every time you try something new you gain a story you can tell. That’s what an interview is — the story of you.
Take a look at what free events, networking and courses there are — you may find something that piques your creative or professional interests. And you don’t even need to spend money! Regardless it’s time for you to go out and experience the world past dingy bars, all-nighters in lab and university networking sessions where you only go for the free pizza.
5. Turn Those Passions into Creativity
It’s common that we downplay our own interests and hobbies as time-wasters. If it’s not actively making us money, or counts as professional development — then it’s useless.
We’ve been trained to believe this, to believe that if we aren’t working towards our next paycheck, our next promotion, or to retire with millions in our bank account, that we are not working towards the right goal. But it’s time for us to unlearn this — not only are allowed to pursue our hobbies, it’s good for us.
There’s a strategy we can use to negate the ‘uselessness’ of our hobbies.
Don’t keep it to yourself — turn your hobby into an outlet for creativity. Bring this creativity to an audience. With the advent of the internet our venues for sharing things we love has expanded. By being active with our hobbies, creating with them for others, we can feel like there is some value to what we do — this way we can overcome our mindset of needing to be useful.
Some ideas:
- Start a book review blog, or review on Goodreads if you love reading
- Review movies or TV shows if you love Netflix
- Join writing competitions or post your work on forums if you love writing
- Post your weekly fitness sets and progress if you love fitness
- Create a set of videos outlining your favourite bike routes if you love biking
- Make music videos using YouTube clips of your favourite anime if you love music and videos and anime
- Start a podcast about conspiracy theories if you love conspiracy theories
The list is endless.
NOTE: it is important not to base the worth of your hobby on your audience. You aren’t actually creating for others, you’re creating for yourself. Rejoice if people stumble upon your work, but do not create for fame or fortune. Create because you want to and you can.
6. Remember You’re Alive
It’s easy to get caught up in thoughts about the future. But no matter how much planning you do, the world will continue to spin.
So you feel like you’re stuck in front of a computer screen all day and the only thing it’s enhancing is your inability to see — it’s easy to be discouraged — but pay attention to the small moments, create something that makes your time spent worthwhile and if nothing else, believe that it will get better and use that belief to ride out the storm.
It’s hard to wake up one day and get your life on track, especially when it feels like it’s spun out so far. Take it one day at a time, you may be in your 20’s but there’s no rush for anything — enjoy the ride, keep learning and don’t give up on your dreams, they don’t have to be dreams forever.