20+ YEARS SUMMED UP (Part 1)
I still remember me at 10 years. I never thought I would make it to this age. To be completely honest, I thought the world would have ended by now. Anyway, childhood was fun but so is growing up (if you want it to be). This here is about all the lessons I have learned throughout my life in regards to different things. I hope whoever gets to read it, young and old alike, can relate or pick a few things from them.
Here we go:
Family is the most important thing. It took me a while to realize that but I’m glad I did. As kids, we fought all the time. It’s funny how most of the fights were caused by stupid things like the remote control and who got to sit on the “favorite couch”. I’m guessing these fights are the same in most families. Nothing was more annoying than the eldest sibling who tried to control everybody’s life. Sometimes I reminisce and find myself laughing; God knows I miss those days. However when you grow up, you begin to realize that no matter how many fights you had (or who sitting where); family will always have your back.
Like most kids, I also “hated” my parents and their rules about literally everything. I’m not saying that they were absolutely right about everything although I have come to realize that the older you get, the more you notice they had the best intentions at heart. The most amazing thing is how much they fought so that you had the best of everything. I remember my dad couldn’t stand me being sad because I lacked a certain toy or video game that my friend had.
When you’re old, it hits you how difficult life can be. I mean, life is tough regardless of which state or country you come from. There are obstacles at every turn (emotional or financial). How my parents held it together is still a mystery to me. Mom and dad were always smiling, because of them life was all rainbows and sunshine. It takes age for you to realize that being a parent surpasses being a superhero.
On Love and Relationship:
Love is real, whether you like to admit it or not. Although, it’s not as you would expect it in movies, songs or telenovelas . Movies end at the first stage of relationship, “the honeymoon phase” with a huge text reading THEY LIVED HAPPILY EVER AFTER. If you ask me, period of dating should be a basis of classifying relationships. It shouldn’t be a relationship unless you have dated for at least a year, because that’s where the true test is. That’s where fighting begins, the boredom, the temptations etc. I personally think it is at this point that an individual can honestly know if they love the other person or not. Truth be told, if you don’t love them; you can’t work any of those problems out.
On Heart Breaks:
If you are reading this and you had your heart broken, let me begin by saying it heals with time. In the meantime focus on growing yourself and love will find you on the way. Don’t go watering dead flowers. Accept the past, learn from it and live in the now and for the future. The biggest mistake I ever did was hanging on to people whom I meant nothing to. Your dignity is your birth right, so don’t let somebody take that away from you.
The most important lesson I have learned over the years about friendship can be summed up by the following quote:
“Some people come into your life as blessings while others come as lessons!”
People come into your life for a reason, season or lifetime. Some friends will stick with you through the good and the bad times, while most will be there because it benefits them. Don’t beat yourself up in trying to decipher who is who. Live in the moment, enjoy it while it lasts and when (if) it’s over, let it go.
I have also learned to be choosy when it comes to the people I spend most of my time with. You eventually become those who are closest to you. If you hang out with bums, you become a bum; it’s as simple as it sounds. Spend a bit more time with people are different from you. It helps expand your horizon and thinking scope. Look for a few friends who take you away from your comfort zone; friends who don’t speak your first language, are older than you, have different financial levels and/or different skin colors.
Loyalty for me is a two-way street. First ensure that you are loyal, and then demand the same from people. However, also be open minded enough to understand that people are people. Ever heard someone saying they are only human? It’s not an excuse, it turns out part of being human is disappointing people. Expect from people what they should expect from you, but be flexible enough to understand that they are not you.