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The responses have covered the waterfront pretty well in terms of the specific question. I want to respond to one rhetorical question you asked: “…do we want to show them it is OK to lie about ourselves?” Answer: of course it is! Everybody does it, and with good reason. Everybody passes sometimes, covers up, and works to fit in (I do. I bet even you do). The grand idea that everyone should — or could — be open about everything is nonsense, since in reality one is only allowed to be open about some things in any social world and faces isolation and rejection (or worse) by being too open. This is not just hypothetical but a universal human reality. The longer response to your question is: “Sometimes you need to equivocate.”

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