Confessions of a fat girl with skinny friends.

Farai
Farai
Aug 9, 2017 · 2 min read

I am often in awe of the women for whom, clothes can simply hang off of the just right proportions of their bodies.

No vulgar protrusions or presumptuous bulges.

Polite bodies.

Those for whom accidental exposure is deemed pleasurable to observers in place of offensive.

I stand in awe of these women and often wonder what great evil I must have courted in my former lives to justify this shell; from within which I have perfected the siren song borne of my self loathing. So enchanting. It fits so well in the corners of my mouth; flows so freely to the forefront.

You’re stomach is disgusting, cover it. That hoody will do.

Your thighs are gonna spread if you sit, wear comfortable shoes.

Don’t smile in these pictures, your cheeks are swallowing your face.

Fix your posture, it’ll make you’re belly look smaller

Stop taking up so much space.

Fabric stretched across my chest: I am aware of every move.

Thighs contained in reinforced leggings, still wear away at the fabric, still destined to release with the sheer pressure of it all.

The accusatory tone of mannequins in the stores a girl my age is meant to frequent…

I am often in awe of women for whom clothes simply hang off of the just enough proportions of their body.

Please.

Teach me how to walk without the whispers of shame in my gait.

Show me how you see yourself so clearly. So fearlessly.

Never even cried at your own reflection…

I am often in awe of the women that have been deemed better than me.

I am sorry that they made me fear you.

But you just take up so much space…

Farai

Written by

Farai

5'2 and mad about it.