Find your cheerleaders

Hyewon
Hyewon
Aug 28, 2017 · 3 min read

“I don’t feel very much like Pooh today,” said Pooh.

“There there,” said Piglet. “I’ll bring you tea and honey until you do.”
— A.A. Milne, Winnie-the-Pooh

I have always known that people had selective hearing. My family member has it. And I know I have it too.
But for those who are close to my heart, I’m always happy listen, and try to hear everything they’re wanting to say.

Because we all want to be heard, acknowledged, and loved;
and to have someone who would give up hours of their day just discussing what’s going on with them and their lives.

We are all unique and different, and yet so similar. We are individually important, and each plays a role to make this world a better place.

Once upon a time, I had a manager who taught me, as soon as someone approaches you, you give them 100% attention, so they know they are being heard, and you are there to help them.
Now, this is the probably the best piece of advice I’ve heard from anybody.
I’m sure you and I both know this. But to have someone to say it to you and remind you the importance of “attention”, it’s awakening.

It was like a light bulb lit up in my head, and I started to notice just how much we ignore the people in front of us, to satisfy the people somewhere else.

Some people I’ve encountered couldn’t even go through one meal without texting somebody else on their phone.
I felt ignored, insignificant, and unimportant,
“Am I not worthy enough for this person’s uninterrupted attention?”

I repeated that thought over and over while I stare at these people who choose to text somebody else while I sat across from them.
When your insecurity rears its head and meets the loss of self-worth, that’s when I start believing it,
“I must not be worth this person’s time and the attention”.

I felt smaller and then smaller again, like the first time I looked up at the sky and thought, “the universe in its greatness, how pointless is this life of mine?”.
That. Small. Unworthy of mention compared to the vast universe.

It hurts when your own mind goes that far.
No one has attacked you except for yourself. And the vicious cycle of self-attack continues like an endless pit of a black hole, it sucks you in pretty deep.
And when you feel like you’ve hit the bottom of the hole, you fall some more.

I’m going to sound like a counsellor or someone inspirational poster but: you have the power to get yourself out of there. Because everything else is a distraction. Your core strength will experience the sense of achievement whilst owning the experience.

Yes, you can have others help. Of course. It’s actually better if you do.
In those times, surround yourself with people who love you and more importantly, people who TRUST you to fight through it, avoid people who try to solve your problems. They have good intentions, but it’s not what you need.

For myself, that sense of trust and the cheer to see you succeed were what I needed during difficult times.
I couldn’t see myself getting through it, but somebody did.
If someone had confidence in me, then there must be something in me that’s worth believing in.

Find your cheerleaders.
Make it through your difficult times and when you do, celebrate.

Just remember to do the same for the people you love; cheer for them. Believe in them, when they don’t have confidence in themselves. Tell them “you’re going to be okay because I believe in you.”

)
Hyewon

Written by

Hyewon

My Purpose: To teach people about self awareness — and allow them to feel confident in their own skin and inspire them to live rather survive.

Welcome to a place where words matter. On Medium, smart voices and original ideas take center stage - with no ads in sight. Watch
Follow all the topics you care about, and we’ll deliver the best stories for you to your homepage and inbox. Explore
Get unlimited access to the best stories on Medium — and support writers while you’re at it. Just $5/month. Upgrade