Guys and Bars

Two girls walk into a bar….

Look maybe it’s just me, but I don’t go to a bar to get hit on. (I don’t walk down the street to get catcalled either.) If I go in with a friend, I plan on leaving with that friend. And If I don’t, most likely that friend is pretty shitty.

But I regress.

How many times does a guy approach uninvited so naturally, with such confidence, as if all this time we have been waiting for this, a man. I mean we must be waiting for a man, right? We are alone after all.

But no. I can’t remember a time I didn’t feel uncomfortable by this interaction. I don’t know you. I don’t want to talk to you. And yet, now I have to because you feel untitled enough to approach me WITHOUT asking, you just assume it’s okay.

It’s not okay. Because even though I’m sure you are a fine person. Even though I sure you have some interesting topic of conversation up your sleeve. I don’t want to talk to you. I find it draining. And I find it an approach on my personal space.

Maybe you could just leave when I start to act uncomfortable. Or when I say something bitchy — just so do realize that I don’t want to talk to you. But you don’t leave. Maybe it just that the same guys that approach girls like this secretly get off by making strange girls uncomfortable.

I understand that bars are PUBLIC spaces. But public spaces should be comfortable to everyone. Yes, people should talk to one another! Yes, we should make new connections! But hitting on a strange right off the bat can be taking a little too far sometimes. Maybe strangers should test the waters first before driving right into each other. You never know what is gonna be on the bottom.

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