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L’appel du Vide


The call of the Void

Is one of my “French things”

It is — for me — a “fear” that my brain will miss-fire and I will accidentally jump off a balcony or something high off the ground.

I am NOT afraid of heights.

I am afraid my brain will decide it won’t hurt if I jump off my balcony or decide I need to “find out” what will happen, even though I already know what the result would be.

It isn’t the same as fear of heights, it is instead, L’appel du Vide (the call of the void).

Weird, eh? I don’t think it is related to PTSD — it isn’t suicidal ideation — I am not thinking about wanting to hurt myself. I am literally afraid my brain will take me over into the void ON ACCIDENT.

But, I’m also terrified of sticking my hand into a drain with a garbage disposal —irrational fear being that the disposal will suddenly turn on and my hand will get minced — or that I will ACCIDENTALLY turn on the disposal myself.

So there’s that. 😂😂


Side note — one of the “suggested tags for this post was “cooking” can you imagine?!?