An Open Letter to SEO Agencies from a Hotshot

DISCLAIMER : What you are about to read is very disturbing that can raise your trust over the humanity. If you are a heart patient, i urge to close this page now and watch Simpsons to get this article out your mind for-ever. If you are going to read this, then i am not liable to any injury caused, mentally, physically or financially to you. If you still want to roll on. Then,

Reader discretion is advised. This is you last chance to turn back.

Here we go.

From,

Gaurav Singh, A hotshot

To,

SEO Agencies (All around the world)

Subject: Sharing some Information that can be helpful to you. pss…SEO.

Respected SEOs,

I am writing this letter in good health, and hope that you all are also in same status and please be because you won’t be after you read this letter. I truly hope that this letter has reached you in pink of health.

First, Let’s get you some backstory……Last month, i started a website on the blogging niche. It was my first one, and i had very great hopes for it. I will not lie, the primary focus of the website was to make some quick bucks. I chose this niche as it seemed to be very popular and i know few things about it. And about the “niche” word, just learned it, from shoutmeloud. Loved it.

So, what happened was, i bought a domain from Godaddy for just $0.99. Good thing, i found it cheap. Though it’s only for a year. I will see later on what to do. I am also hoping to get more domains by creating many emails ids. I will see what to do with them later.

I was just watching TV, a bit thinking about the hosting space and other things that were to be created. Suddenly, then, a message came, A Brilliant Hosting Offers. The best point, these guys also do SEO, and they say they are the best. They will help me later too .I will take that, no questions asked. And about SEO, i do not think there will be any need for that. I can help myself.

Okay, so i created a WordPress website, from learning online. Now, i am thinking, what to do next. Yeah, i need some kickass theme, but there’s a problem. These themes are quite expensive. No worries, i know about nulled.

So, i have all setup, i mean basics. Now, What should i write. Let me check other websites. I have decided, i will write on WordPress, SEO, and making money online etc….. Woah, i see SEO things are trending, i must write on that, reader are gonna flood in here. My first Article was, how to get more traffic to your website today. I even, created an ebook about SEO. It’s all about fake credibility, you know that. But, shit…not a single reader or visitor. It’s been 3 days. I will learn, from other sites. *Spent some days scrolling articles*. I should get help from forums, sure they can help me.

*Can you review my website, I am not getting traffic, please suggest what i do?*

*Experts Replies*

  • Write unique content
  • Build backlinks ( must)
  • Do proper SEO onpage and offpage
  • Share actively on social media
  • etc..etc…

*Few days later*

*Hello, brothers….I got an email from adsense that my application has been rejected. What should i do now. Can you please review my website and suggest improvements. Thanks in Advance.*

*Expert Replies*

  • Follow adsense guidelines
  • Write Unique Content
  • Get some traffic first

huuuuhhhhhh….:(

If you are thinking, there is nothing about SEO, you have just read 1/5 (maybe more) of total. But…I HAVE TO GO to EAT, SO……
Really..Continued in Part 2 : Hotshot getting into the SEO Web.

Liked it? HIT THE Green HEART ,

This article is part of an experiment to determine how the beginning of the article can influence the reader into reading the whole article even if the article in not related to it. Making changes in the beginning and making the readers’ hope for something in context can lead to reduce in bounce rate. If you are reading this note, that means you are among those who have read it fully.
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