So, your line of reasoning goes like this: a 12-year-old girl shouldn’t be all that shocked or saddened or frustrated (or possibly scared) by death threats and messages about alternate realities of legal rape because… she probably started it herself? Jesus, are you kidding me?
Your argument is really flawed. Saying that the high road exists shouldn’t give a free pass to others to rain down abuse. Sure, I can choose the high road when necessary, but everyone else should be held to that exact. same. standard. Trolls should be expected to not troll, just like you seem to expect 12-year-old girls to stop bringing abuse upon themselves by existing in a public space. Your argument basically says that bullies shouldn’t be expected to stop bullying since the victims of bullying have the obligation to ignore it.
I do agree with you that trolls are people with a severely underdeveloped sense of empathy, and that it is a psychosis to deal strictly on the anonymous online level. But to say that a young woman who is trying to find an online place that is fun to be, who is trying to contribute something cool to the world, is somehow the perpetrator of her own negative experience, is just plain thoughtless.