1000 ways to date in the west

Shirtless / Catfish Man

I started emailing shirtless man via match.com for a solid month before he gave me his real email, not his phone number. From his profile he was intelligent, typical Texas boy (wears jeans, boots, vests and polo caps), likes to hunt etc. I thought it was a bit odd that we emailed back and forth several times a day for almost 2 months before I gave him my number and he decided to text me. He lives in a separate city about 120 miles away so actually meeting him was going to take some strategy and planning which, I was waiting for him to make. The reason behind his name is he constantly sent me shirtless pictures of himself, I wasn’t complaining but they never had his face in them which I found odd. After exchanging texts, emails and snapchats for almost 4 months with no hope of actually meeting him I had enough of him blowing me off. In one last attempt, I made arrangements to travel with my coworker as she works in the town he lives. Our conversations had been few and far between for a couple of weeks so, I didn’t have high hopes that I would actually meet him (hence the name catfish, I didn’t believe he was who he said he was.) The plan was to meet each other for coffee (in the middle of the afternoon) and finally put a face to the shirtless pictures haha. I left my co-worker in the truck and told her to wait for the bat signal to come save me. I texted her 30 minutes in to come join us since, after meeting him I truly didn’t think I was his type so I turned it into a friendly coffee and was going to chalk it up as a loss. However, we parted and he asked me to stay for dinner and he would drive me home afterwards. Of course my co worker says no, thinking the worst and I am hesitant as well so I said next time and we were on our way. As he texted me the whole way home, I wondered why he couldn’t say the things he was saying to me in person but I just thought he was just shy ( I can scare guys with how loud and outgoing I am sometimes).

We continued to talk and plan a date for the next week the negative thing was he wanted me to come back down to him. With hesitation I agreed to go meet him for dinner for our official “first date.” This should have been my first flag of how this “relationship” was going to go. Dinner went well, I was attracted to him, his manners and his demeanor were on point, to what I had been looking for, needless to say, I was smitten with this man. I left him that night on cloud 9 thinking to myself that shirtless man and I could be something great! The weekend passed and I thought it was odd he didn’t want to see me again until the next week where again, I gave in and went to see him. This routine of me going to see him continued for roughly 2 months. He never once came to stay or see me in my hometown which was one of the many things that drove me crazy. I would like to think of myself as an even-level headed female however, I have never had anyone drive me to the level of crazy like shirtless man. The idea still vexes me maybe, it was the lack of communication on his end, the idea that I had in my head that I wasn’t his type but strived to be, or the fact that part of me knew it wasn’t going to work but I was holding onto that idea I had in my head that we were destined to be together (sad I know but it happens to the best of us.) He is a very guarded, quiet man in the sense that I thought eventually he would open up to me, this didn’t happen until after we broke it off. The last straw for me was he told me he was going to Houston for work and was staying with a female co-worker. At that point, I thought to myself we were on different “dating” pages. I know we had discussed what we were and apparently I took it differently. In the end our so called “relationship” I was just a girl that came to see him at his beck in call. I, to this day do not think he had any intention to seriously date me like I had hoped. I will be the first to say I was delusional during this period. I really learned that you can not push something on someone that doesn’t feel the same way or want the same thing you do. Also, that it is imperative for communication no matter how small the issue is.

Shirtless man and I are now and continue to be good friends and he still drives me crazy!

Lessons Learned: A. Don’t hop into something because you are lonely and you think something is there B. If there is distance between you (living in different cities) communication, OPEN, communication is imperative to keep anything alive and that goes for romance or friendship. C. Don’t ever think less of yourself and try to make yourself attractive for someone. If you are not their type that is their loss.

e. We are still friends to this day, but he still drives me crazy! Hahah but in a good way.