Remembering Friends after Their Homegoing

One of these things is not like the other.

Had a dear friend at work who passed away unexpectedly a few years ago.

She was an incredibly kind person and had invited me and my family to her grandson’s birthday party — even though we didn’t live anywhere near each other.

Not too long after her mohter passed away she was diagnosed with Diabetes. I’m not sure if the doctors had not worked out the medication properly or didn’t explain or provide enough instructions for her but she passed away a few weeks afterward. (Writing this reminds me that I need to get permission to complete my friend’s mother’s Temple work. I also need to get permission to do my other friends’ work — at least three of them from work have passed away recently. One of them I searched for on FamilySearch and found his wife’s ancestors Temple work has already been done. Interesting.)

My family and I went to Richmond, VA for Spring Break — to Beaumont, to the wedding reception of a friend of mine, and to some water parks. Couldn’t help but remember her as we listened to Christmas in LA by the Killers which we updated as we sang it to be: Sprinbreak in Richmond, VA

More powerfully — and a song I had to turn off as it brings emotions too powerfully even with the more optomistic lyrics we updated the song with: I of the Storm, by Of Monsters and Men:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M2eKjotiofY

I have faced them
I have made amends with all my shadows
They bow thier heads and welcome me

But I feel it burning
Like when the winter wind stops my breathing
Are you really gonna love me when I’m gone?
I fear you won’t
I fear you don’t

And it echoes when I breathe
’Til all you’ll see is my ghost
Empty vessel, crooked teeth
Wish you could see
And they call me up there

I’m not shaking like a leaf
And they call me up there
I don’t wither underneath in this storm

I am a stranger
I am an alien inside a structure
Are you really gonna love me when I’m gone?
With all your thoughts
And all your faults

I feel it biting
I feel it break my skin, so uninviting
Are you really gonna need me when I’m gone?
I know you will
I know you will

And it echoes when I breathe
’Til all you’ll see is my ghost
Empty vessel, crooked teeth
Wish you could see
And they call me up there

I’m not shaking like a leaf
And they call me up there
I don’t wither underneath in this storm

After a year since that was the Church policy at the time, I asked her son if I could present her name in the Temple and he agreed.

My wife and daughter served as proxy for my friend and we completed her Temple work.

A few days later I noticed a post on social media from friends of mine. They had met up and celebrated the memory of our friend who had passed away.

I ran into a few of them a few days later and after greeting them, I said:

“That get together looked really fun. Thanks for inviting me.”

One of them replied matter of factly:

We would have invited you but you don’t drink.

True.

There is no wrong way to remember our friends adn loved ones who are called home to that God who gave them life. Whatever way we remember our loved one who have passed away is a beautiful way to remember them.

Completing Temple work on behalf of our loved ones who have passed is something entirely different — in a beautiful eternal way.

It doesnt help to feel bad or jealous for not being invited to get-togethers or meet-ups when we are called to take part in a great work.

A Marvelous Work and a Wonder (short video from 2011)