i knew from a young age i was different.
when all the other 3rd grade girls has crushes on boys and i had them on girls.
when i told my counselor my dilemma and she told me it was best to keep it to myself, and try to fix it before it became a habbit.
so i convinced myself i liked boys more than girls, so i could be normal.
and it worked for a while, until 5 grade when i met a girl who shall not be named, and practically fell in love. well, as much love as a 10 year old can fall into.
i cried myself to sleep for weeks, wondering what was so wrong with me. why did i feel like this? this isnt normal.
and then in 6th grade i met the boy who is now my best friend, and convinced myself i liked him, and cut the girl off. i just wanted to feel normal.
everyone already thought i liked him, why not go along with it? and i did for 2 years. i even dated him. but i didn’t feel right.
i knew what a lesbian was by then, i knew it was a completely normal thing. but i grew up being told it wasn’t. so i was petrified of who i was.
and in 8th grade, i met another girl. and she liked me too.
i didn’t really understand why, but she did. and i didn’t know what to do.
i was so confused, after years of convincing myself to be who i wasn’t, i was finally being shown who i actually was, was okay.
so i told her.
and for the first time in a long time, i felt so fucking happy.
only a couple other people know, people i really trust.
now im a freshman, who is still slightly confused on her sexual orientation but secretly identifies as a lesbian.
and that is fucking okay.
so this is me, introducing myself to everyone else.
my name is emily miranda day, and i am a lesbian.