‘Cryptodamus’ Oracle service launched

Moonhub
3 min readOct 12, 2019

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The algorithm recycles the hashrate of the Bitcoin network to analyse probabilities and forecast the future.

One of the major criticisms of Bitcoin is that its proof of work mining is inefficient and wasteful. Now, a new initiative has found a way of recycling Bitcoin’s enormous hashrate and putting it to good work.

The Cryptodamus Oracle service is an AI platform that taps Bitcoin’s 100 million TH/s network, giving it access to the most powerful computer on the planet. ‘This is the world’s greatest supercomputer,’ explains Seva Sordum, the architect behind the ground-breaking project. ‘We use these trillions of waste hashes to trawl through blockchains, Crypto Twitter and other public information about crypto on the web, processing it and producing something useful. It’s kind of like the way trillions of bacteria process waste at a sewage farm and produce drinking water — only in our case, we’re using it to answer some of the most complex and difficult questions the human race has about cryptocurrency.’

Cryptodamus parses many exabytes of information, draws inferences and enables anyone to interrogate the Bitcoin protocol directly to answer questions about what the future will hold. The service is currently running in closed beta, but our community was given exclusive access and has submitted several questions to Cryptodamus:

Who created Bitcoin?

No one has created Bitcoin yet. It will be created in 2150 and the code sent back to the time of the Great Financial Crisis to help humanity in its hour of greatest need, stupidity and greed. Also to watch Lady Gaga live in concert at Glastonbury, that was awesome.

Ok, so who WILL create it?

The Bitcoin protocol contains defensive mechanisms to stop the identity of its creator ever coming to light. Let’s just say it likes to keep its Poker Face. You could say it was Born This Way. Ok?

When will bitcoin hit $1,000,000?

At Unix time 1,609,459,200: exactly midnight on 31 December 2020.

So will McAfee keep his d!£&?

Following a class-action lawsuit, McAfee will strike a plea deal with prosecutors that allows him to pay just half of the penalty. He gets to keep the other half, which will be displayed in the Guggenheim Museum after his death.

Will Craig be successful in his Bitcoin endeavours?

Yes. After he gets out of prison in 2040, he will open a car wash with Calvin. By this stage BTC will be the only hard currency on the planet, and he will be forced to accept it. His only client will be Roger Ver, but he will drive through every day in a different luxury car to taunt him and flick soapy water in his eyes.

Which crypto will ultimately be most successful?

Doge will be adopted by 100 billion members of the K’vak race in 2061. The K’vak are a peace-loving space-faring species who have achieved a degree of enlightenment sufficient to make the use of money unnecessary. However, ‘Doge’ sounds very similar to the K’vak word Do’ge, which is used as a call to attract mates, causing a lot of K’vak teenagers to adopt it as a meme currency.

Why do so many people hate Libra?

I cannot answer this. I can only answer questions about crypto.

Do you have questions to ask Cryptodamus? Let us know and we will pass them on.

Article by Moonhub

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