When you find your people
There’s just certain people that you meet in your life and you just click with them. I had many fake clicks over the years, always fantasizing about the people who I was going to be with for the rest of my live. The friends I was going to have with me forever.
I wanted people who would love me and not try and change me. I wanted people who wouldn’t tease me without making sure I was okay first. I wanted ones who actually wanted to see me outside of school, the ones who were content just lying together on a couch or a bed, without worrying about anything. I wanted people who had the same interests as me and got excited over the same things, or didn’t care about my nerdiness.
That was my goal when I came to college. I wanted my forever friends. I immediately looked for this friendship in my roommate. I hit a dead end with someone who just wasn’t compatible with me. Through some difficult and lonely times, along with some utter betrayal, I found myself hanging out with girls on my floor.
Although it was hard, because of, ya know, my difficult psyche. To throw in some background, I am an extremely mindful person. I hate imposing myself, I hate thinking I am unwanted, I get anxious in new situations or when I feel like I did something wrong. So making new friends is hard, especially in a new place without any safety blanket.
I would spend most of my time in our floor lounge because I was afraid to go to others rooms in fear of bothering them. This fear has only dispersed (most of the time) when it comes to my forever friends.
I met my friends since we lived on the same floor, and I soon enjoyed their characteristics and the way they treated me. I fell in love with their humor, their close friendship, their love and loyalty. They swept me up and brought me into their friend group, and to this day I am grateful for it.
They are some of the best people I know, and I am lucky enough to be living with them next year. They are are special, incredible, fantastic and wonderful in their own way.
There’s the dad of the group, even though he was the youngest. He’s intelligent, humorous and never fails to amaze everyone with his photography and videography skills. He is aesthetic goals and is going to be someone one day. I am just lucky to know him now.
There’s my best friend, my rock and someone who knows me better than most. He is kind, smart, loyal and always makes me feel better. He’s creative, a great hugger and I can’t wait to see what he gets to do with his life. I have already given him the job of godfather of my future family.
There is my saving grace, and angels, honestly. I never had girlfriends like them before. They’re warm and full of life and happiness. They welcomed me into their friendship with open arms and are incredibly patient about my quirks and anxieties. They’re both smart and kind and funny and I literally could go on and on because I am so happy to have friends like them.
Feeling comfortable in a friendship can be hard, but when you can let yourself be completely and utterly you, it gives you a sense of warm feelings. I can relax with them at the end of a long day. I know that they know almost everything about me, and that I won’t have to explain myself most times. I don’t have to change who I am to be with them, and that is the biggest thing in my life. I enjoy having a diverse group of friends who just likes to watch good movies and having a massive cuddle piles and who protect me and love me. It is a feeling that is unfamiliar to me, but one that I embrace wholly every day.