Part 1: Round 1. Ding. Ding.
July 2015
Without going over the whole long story of how we ended up here, getting IVF treatment, it was down to a number of unexpected health and life reasons, that we’d had to put off starting a family a bit later than we’d hoped. It was late 2013/early 2014 that we really realised that something was up and whilst those nearest and dearest to us were sharing their good news with gusto, we still weren’t getting anywhere.
We were put on the IVF waiting list with unexplained infertility, and after completing the standard required period of ‘trying’ of 18 months; following a couple of visits to the hospital to chat to the doctor, and have tests to prove we were fit, healthy and didn’t smoke, we passed through to the next level…
Although provided with loads of information on the process in advance by the hospital, I, like others just couldn’t help looking for more online — what to do, what not to do, what to eat and anything else that might help improve our chances. I guess I’m sharing my diary entries as a bit of a release, but also I’m keen to share what we learned, and learned to stay away from online. I know that unless you are actually going through IVF, it’s difficult to know what it actually entails behind the scenes, so here it is.
This blog doesn’t cover the huge emotional rollercoaster ride of the process — the relationship strains; the out of the blue questions about your ‘situation’ that make you burst out in tears much to the surprise of yourself and the person asking; the fibs to take work time off; or the unexpected bumps you face in real life and all over social media (coming off of Facebook on Christmas days/Mother’s day/School starting day and so on seems a bit extreme but it’s one coping mechanism...). This blog mainly just goes through the medical facts and occasional bumps — maybe I will cover the other side one day, but not today.
The inter web is a particularly dark place for IVFers looking for answers, and so this is nothing but the truth, the honest and sometimes the all too graphic truth. Ok, warning done!
Day 1 — Wednesday 22 July 2015
Round 1 started — a box arrived through the letterbox with instructions on taking Suprecur, a nasal spray to down regulate the hormones/pituitary glands to stop producing eggs and to get my uterine lining thin. I had to take (snort?) this spray 4 times throughout each day for 3 weeks, which made it interesting to do each day at work and on the road! Eye watering goodness.
Day 21 — Tuesday 11 August
Scan 1. After 3 weeks of this, we were back to the hospital to see how I was taking to the treatment. This was my first experience of a routine internal scan — one of the many bizarre and unforgettable for all the wrong reasons, experiences. Unfortunately my lining wasn’t thin enough — it was 11mm and had to be 3mm ish!
Following having to take a pregnancy test to be allowed to take away the extra strong meds to get me on to the next stage, which didn’t seem very fun or fair given the situation, I was sent home with a five day course of Provera. Was told this on top of the nasal spray, would help me ‘shed’ my lining, a nice technical term which has joyfully stayed with me.
Crazy food/drink actions: staying away from alcohol and caffeine as best I can. Eating blueberries, pineapple, nuts a lot. Medication side effects: Sore head throughout. Sleeplessness. Sleepiness. Shedding. Bloat.
Day 36 — Wednesday 26 August
Scan 2. Periods came as predictably aided by drugs when on week away on holiday, relaxing. So had to phone and book an appointment for a second scan, once I’d shedded some more. Another internal scan, which showed on the ultrasound screen that my lining still wan’t thin enough (6.5mm). Given I’d been on the nasal spray and pills, the nurse had to check what next — as this wasn’t standard protocol/or common.
Through quite a lot of tears from me, she talked me through how to inject the next course of action, Buserelin, a stronger version of the drug — showing me how to get rid of air bubbles and tried to comfort me by telling me at least this was just once a day rather than using the spray four times a day. I guess. Left still a bit upset in the rain, and managed to fake illness for my afternoon meetings and went home to get some headspace.
Injection to my tummy (the least sorest place with the most padding I believe) took a while to do, and I definitely felt a new adoration for people with diabetes and other conditions that have to do this every day. Started periods again on the 31st…
Day 43 — Wednesday 2 September
Scan 3. Back for my third scan, a mammoth 22 days after I should have first passed through to the next stage. Thankfully she did the probe scan and said my lining was nice and thin, about 3mm! She talked me through the next stage — another injection, Bemfola, to add to my existing one. Oddly relieved and feeling better about everything — actually went and had a shopping fix after work to celebrate a little, which I can’t remember when/if I last did!
Yay, on to double injections — I became a pro putting them in either side of my tummy button, one in the morning and one in the evening — a proper voodoo doll — flicking and squirting pesky air bubbles into smithereens! This time, it’s about building up a nice, fresh, new lining and encouraging follicles to grow. Period only started to stop on the 8th Sept (having started on the 31st — ages). Feeling pretty lethargic, particularly in the evenings. Also felt quite flat, like not able to speak to people properly, which was challenging in the office sometimes.
Day 52 — Friday 11 September
Day 52. 52! Back to hospital for probe scan to see how my follicles are doing, it was also the first time my partner was allowed in to the room with me to see me in the full works, scan screen and me in my stirrups! The nurse measured the sizes of the follicles, and was told that there were about 4–5 follicles that were mature enough to be collected early next week.
Apparently 2–3 of them were approx 13mm which was good and a couple more might have grown by collection day. At this stage I didn’t know that this was a fairly low number of eggs, it was only afterwards in some serious online searching I realised. We also hadn’t anticipated things would happen so quickly (even despite it being a massively extended process!) in terms of egg collection.
We had to do a fair bit of juggling our lives around but all was on/fine for collection on Monday next week. Hilariously, in a good way, my uterine lining was now 13mm which is now a good thing! Surprised a little by the urgency of everything, and a little nervous about how out of control you feel.
Was sent away with a final injection, (you get the pattern here?) called Ovitrelle — the ‘trigger’ injection, which had to be put into the fridge at home until instructed to take it. All a bit James Bond really.
Spent the weekend tidying, getting some work done and catching up with friends and family, so that we were set for the week ahead. Was phoned by the hospital and instructed to take the final Ovitrelle injection at precisely 9.20pm on Saturday night. Duly did with some figuring out, as a fancy pen injection rather than standard fill it yourself version. Stayed sane by watching lots of Netflix series in the evenings.
Woke on the Sunday feeling bloated with water, before a fairly lazy day, topping up on the fresh veg and crazy food stuff — pineapple, blueberries, brazil nuts and avocado… Peeing nearly every 30 mins, but no injections for the first time in 16 days. Small mercies.
Day 55 — Monday 14 September
Collection day. Awoke super early, 5am, kind of weirdly excited to get to this stage, although reading way too much stuff online/on forums about food/drinks/nail polish and hairdye. Found Ebay as some kind of (granted more expensive) diversion tactic. We were over at the hospital for 8am as requested, and the waiting area filled up fast with couples who were in for similar treatment.
It was also the first time we’d seen anyone we knew in the ward, and they, a professional rather than a patient, got to be way more intimate with me that I’d ever anticipated. Weirdly this nearly made me cry. I changed into the attractive gown and lay down on the bed, and was knocked out with anaesthetic before being wheeled away to the operating room. My partner went off to do his bit, in the odd little room complete with mags……
I remember no more until the surgeon told us that they’d managed to collect 5 eggs. I had to ask my partner again and again as I was still pretty groggy and couldn’t remember the number. After a while of keeping making the alarm go off for not breathing deeply enough, and feeling pretty faint, I was back to normal, had some tea and toast — then the compulsory pee before leaving at 10.30am. Complete with next round of meds — Crinone, a progesterone vaginal gel to be taken (inserted?) daily, to help progesterone levels in my body and make my womb a happy place. Oh the joy. I will give no updates about this med, but will leave it to your imagination.
I hung out with more Netflix in the afternoon and awaited the progress update by phone tomorrow morning.
Day 56 — Tuesday 15 September
A phone call from nurse confirmed that only 2 of the embryos had fertilised and were suitable. Not sure whether this was good or bad odds, this naivety was probably better at this stage (until reading the forums later). Feeling pretty bloated still, peeing all the time and although sleepy, finding it hard to sleep all through the night.
I actually did the cutting a pineapple core into sections thing and eating it each day after transfer. Told you, the internet is a weird place full of hokum that first time around you will try anything (and if it works for you, then great as there’s no harm, but there’s no medical proof of their abilities either).
Day 58 — Thursday 17 September
Embryo transfer day — 3 day transfer. Slept a little better but not much. Nervous but excited. Can’t believe it’s been 2 months since starting out — as I said to my partner and the nurse — you start by skooshing stuff up your nose, and then end if by skooshing it down below!
Appointment at 9.45am, finally got taken after what seemed like ages but in reality was only a matter of minutes. Saw the Embryologist who assured us that the 2 remaining eggs were top quality — grade 7 and grade 8 for a day 3 transfer. As we’d discussed the night before, when asked how many we’d liked transferred we agreed just one embryo. They now need to wait until day 5 after collection to freeze it, if it makes it.
We were shown to a tiny changing room, for some comedy gold changing into gowns, hats, blue shoes, and him into scrubs. Selfies were taken to inject a little humour into the whole ordeal. After the zillionth time of being asked to confirm names/ date of births, we were taken through to the room which I can only describe as a Willy Wonka sterile white room.
Although there were sadly no Oompa Loompas, we were shown into a little interrogation-like room, which had a massive great spotlight ready to focus on my particular area. It was a cross between a torture chamber and a Mastermind set. I got myself up into the bed, up into the stirrups, and then the whole bed was raised up, so that my bits were eye level for the 4 people in the room. Weird as.
I was so glad then that I’d asked to go for a bit of a last minute pee earlier, as I’d been told to come with a full bladder, unfortunately mine had been way too full and almost bursting — the nurse put gel on my tummy and did a scan to reveal I still had a nice full bladder, and I was still bursting.
After I was cleaned up down there — yes, again, very weird…. They used the speculum to insert the catheter up my cervix and we got to watch it on screen. Once ready, the doctor knocked on a door, and the embryologist appeared with the egg and it was inserted to it’s destination — my womb. It was a pretty unpleasant procedure, but relatively fast, and the nurse was doing her bit to try and keep me chatting, and I think my partner was glad he was up top.
After a few minutes, I clambered down and rushed to the toilet… Back in the teeny room getting changed and sent home in no time — we were even given a scan photo of my insides to keep. I was given some final wise words that ‘there’s nothing you can do now which will make a difference to the outcome’. I kept this in mind, at least until I got home and switched my computer on again.
We left the hospital before 11am feeling happy, plus no more injections for me.
Days 59–67 — 18–26 September
Trying not to over analyse every potential symptom and sign. It’s tough. The dreaded 2ww (2 week wait). Tried to keep as calm and rested too, but that’s tough too. Days pass — 1dp3dt, 2dp3dt, 3dp3dt, then 4dp3dt (4 days past a 3 day transfer) — tracking the days and reading all the crazy forum people’s thoughts but never engaging, ever.
Things I’ve jotted down over this period include having stomach cramps; swapping sweet snacks for all the online alleged tricks of cashews, tofu bits and tomatoes; falling asleep really early; being in a totally horrific mood that I couldn’t shake off; taking a myriad of vitamins; being teary often; hair and skin oily always; coughing lots; lower tummy feeling full and even more symptom spotting…
Literally swinging from thinking I’m definitely not, to I definitely am, to definitely not again within the space of 3 hours of one day. Trying to keep everything in perspective, but 14 days feels like the longest ever.
Had a weird long pain from my stomach to my breast on day 3 after; but from the 24th onwards (7 days after) I was pretty unconvinced that anything was happening and just knew I’d be starting my periods soon… All I want to do now is dye my hair and have a very large glass of wine.
Had a crap day on 26th, was super blubbery in the morning, tried to put focus on other things all day, things got better as the day went on.
Day 68 — Sunday 27 September
10 days past. Started my period, so at least I got to have that wine and colour my hair. The next few days were tough, and teary, but fortunately my partner and I had some time away. Had to do the pregnancy test on 4th Oct, it was negative funnily enough.
Phoned the hospital and the lovely empathetic nurse made me well up again on the phone, as we’d found out 3 days after the transfer that the other embryo had survived and was fit to be frozen, we were told that will be used the next round — so not technically a full new round, just a half? And now we wait…
Total length of process: 64 days. Had period for 22 of those days.
