My Friend, Bitterness

A poem.

Not Me Alone Photography, 2017

I believe a pen and paper

Are therapeutic,

But not as much as the

Ability to change the composition of something

Change its physical make-up

Make it so it can no longer function

Become its master,

Make it beg to exist

Show it what’s what,

Limit its dreams

Right now I’m stopping myself,

Holding back the fists —

The punches they long to throw

Pushing down the desire to destroy

I want to end something

I want to kick it, stab it

Smite something until is has no active parts

Limit its abilities,

Make it mine

While a pen and paper

May seem like a cure-all for some,

There are others whose first reaction is to act

A call to arms internally,

The impending wrecking of a home

I want to destroy those memories

They keep calling out, beckoning

Suffocating all the light I surround myself with

I need to end them so I can breathe again

Bitterness festers if you let it,

I know because mine has

Every day I want to know

Just how I can let every speck of it go

Remedy me,

This relenting feeling is strong

I’m longing for peace from this demon

While every day I feed it a little bit more

I’ve got to be able to even the score

Let me show it its end

Let me be myself again

This pain will leave my bones,

The rattling gone

Let my spirit fly high

The animal dead inside,

The claw marks will eventually fade

As the scratching will be done

I will be able to start fresh

As scars plague my visage, will I live

Thriving in the absolute knowledge

That I have done the right thing

And ended the ongoing hate once and for all


About the Author: My loves are Jesus Christ, rock climbing, photography, classic novels, the Nationals, Scooby-Doo, and the Killers. For more, follow me on Instagram here.

Hunter Lyndsley Ohmann

Written by

I love my husband, nutrition, photography, rock climbing, and writing. Get at me.

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