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pumpkin eater

have you ever been cheated on?

I’ve began to grapple with the fact that, as I meticulously close in on my first 100 writing prompts, some terms have surfaced, resurfaced, and will surface again.

Cheat being one of those terms.

I’ve certainly never been cheated on, in the romantic sense of the word. At least not that I know of.

Let’s shorten this long story.

Out of a larger conflict, one that doesn’t really need to be described, spawned an unprompted explanation for a fictional inquiry into relational start dates.

Nothing was ever proven, and it definitely wasn’t pursued. My experience with cheating, or lack there of, carries an interesting commentary. I do not believe I have suffered any wrong doing. I did not prompt or solicit any action, explanation, or compromise. Yet, through the quarrels of relentless teenaged stupidity, I’m forced to hear the reasoning out. As much as 15 months after the fact, is the truth of the matter all that important.

Needless to say, the only time the words were brought up or the idea was referenced, was completely trivial in its occurrence.

It feels unusual to discuss, because cheating is such a monumental betrayal of trust. This is especially true as more committed time passes between the parties involved. It’s the type of pain you may never experience, and yet don’t wish on the worst dude you know.

The trust that lives hand-in-hand with love is such a massive feeling. and the cheater has the ability to make that feeling crumble. fall. pile unto itself.

It’s the thing that denies us our ability to live fully, unabashedly, unashamedly, without an asterisks. When our trust is betrayed, the longest healing process in the history of the human spirit manifests itself in the introspection, the wining, the wallowing, the binge watching, the loneliness, and the disheartened effort of those around you.

Nothing concise or inspired. Just some thoughts.

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