These are ninjas. M’ok?

Demeaning titles

Ninja, Rockstar or Jedi — please don’t

What the fudge is it all about?

To a certain extent I get it. You’re good at what you do, so you want others to know it. OK. Yes. But a little bit of dignity and an ounce of professionalism wouldn’t go amiss would it? The industry I operate in, namely web stuff, already has a massive issue with job titles and role descriptions. Stop making it worse.

But for the record let’s look at what these words actually mean as defined by Wikipedia or Wiktionary:

Ninja: a person skilled in ninjutsu.

All those web design ninjas — do you actually know how to do ninjutsu? Are you really very skilled in a stealth based martial art? Are you any good at espionage, sabotage, infiltration and assassination? Do you wear a loose fitting garment that mimics modern pyjamas? If so — ace! But exactly how do any of these skills relate to web design?

I have a better word: twat.

Jedi: a member of the mystical knightly order in the Star Wars films, trained to guard peace and justice in the Universe

Really. So you’re a member fictional order of religious quasi-psychic knights who guard the peace and manage justice across the galaxy, that’s managed to permeate popular culture and actually spawn a real-life religion? What peace and justice needs to be guarded when you’re a graphics designer? Also light-sword wielding? Does that come in handy on a day-to-day basis? Again, amazing. Well done you. I can see how some form of physic skills are needed with some clients, mind-reading for one, but broadly speaking aren’t psychics hokum?

I have a better word: dick.

Rockstar: A member of a rock band, or a solo artist in the genre

Much more plausible that you could be in a rock band and also do something else as a full-time job. But again, why combine the two? Do you use your Mac keyboard like an actual guitar? Do you strut around the place in rockstar trousers that leave nothing to the imagination? Do you engage in hardcore partying doing tons of drugs and alcohol and getting loads of sex with groupies? You’re a digital architect and you have groupies? Wow. That must be a first. Rock stars are notorious for being late, spaced out and generally untrustworthy. What good qualities for a professional.

I have a better word: wanker.

Real ninjas don’t brag

The above quote, recently from Shut Up and Get To Work, sums things up nicely for me. Ninjas are subtle and innocuous. They don’t ponce about the place shouting about how great they are. Neither do professionals who are good at what they do. Be humble. Be good at what you do.

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