Buffer It
A Situational Pattern.
Situation
You had a charged response. And you want to change the situation that caused it… but you need the help of others to do so. So how might you land your perspective effectively as a way to enlist others to see what you see and make the change together? Create a buffer between what you feel, the situation and how you speak to it… and then take action.
Pattern
1. Let it come through.
Feel what you feel and let it be there it’s raw form. Be with it. Write it down of it helps.
2. Give it some time.
Maybe it’s a slight pause, a couple minutes, a few hours or even days. Scale it to your needs. But be sure that you intercept your immediate response so that you can understand it clearly before responding.
3. Identify what’s at the root.
What are you having a response to? What do you feel and why? Do others feel the same way? If not, what might help them see what you see? Distill to a root cause and understand how this root cause might look to others.
4. Identify the help you need.
How might others help? What is needed so that others see what you see and want to change this root issue too? What message would resonate most with them to get them on your side?
5. Package, deliver and measure.
Try your message out. Does it land? Does it help others see what you see… and then do they want to take action with you? If not, adjust and try another again. When your message seems to get close to working, keep going.
Why
Change often requires the collective effort of one or more groups. You might see where things need to go… but you also need to enlist others to help you get there. Being able to clearly understand what’s underneath a charged response you are having and then packaging your message to land effectively and enlist others to help is critical. Buffer your response, then act to be more effective… and make the change you want to see happen… happen!
Curious about Situational Patterns? Learn more about Situational.ly.
