The Wall Always Lies

“The wall always lies” — he said as we made small talk on the way up the hill.

How many ways do we kid ourselves and lull ourselves into a silly sense of playing the real game?

How do we effort and invest ourselves in busy work that shrinks our story and lessens our light?

I play tennis everyday
 Against a wall

My bones are brittle and my body is bruised

But I still can put on a good show

So when a kid walked by and said — “You want to hit?” — I wasn’t too put off by the USTA T-shirt

I was unprepared for the onslaught of embarrassment I brought to the house of Stark.

After all — I frequent the wall.

The wall is a lie

A trick I play on myself — for myself — that I’m still in the game

But when the game comes to you — not to embarrass or impress,
 but just to be what it is- real and raw, it holds up a mirror.

You can look away.

But you can’t hide and pretend you were in it all along

I said — sometime later on the way down the hill –

“Hey I haven’t played much in a while but before this…….I thought I was hitting pretty well.”

After all.

On the wall.

He said with a smile, a second time now — with evidence and our fresh experience to tether this truth

“The wall always lies “

And it was true.

If you are going to play the game — play it right and play it real

The wall is happy to delight in your delusion

But in the end — when we play it soft and small and seek out and sneak about the safety of the shade –

We fool nobody but ourselves.

Originally published at

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