Dear Muslim Man !
Dear Muslim man,
I’m writing these lines to remind you of some concepts that are forgotten and hidden in the huge amounts of traditions and political willings to ridiculize ideological principles.
I tried to act like a global comprehensive citizen after discovering your stereotypes like I will cope with whatever mentality is around. But I couldn’t.
First, I would like to gently remind of the widespread mindset.
We are colleagues, classmates or whatever, that does not mean that you have to see me only as a woman ( in the sexual meaning of the word). Traditions have made you strongly believe that a Muslim woman ( a real believer ) should be shy, does not appear where men are, do not object. That she mustn’t make eye contact and act like she is coping with whatever her man would say. That she must be quiet, silent, invisible ( I will not give the typical argument of women and kitchen), to eventually say that she is well educated and modest. A good Muslim woman should be smart and beautiful at the same time and she must be intelligent to understand your signs without a single word and to be patient enough to play with the romantic hide and seek until you decide that she is the one.
Dear Muslim Man, can’t you see how much superficial this is? Can’t you see that a real strong believing Muslim man would chose the woman that will be there for him in hardships , the woman that he trusts without supervision, the woman that will be “a man” when he is absent, that woman who will raise her children to be worriers ( physically and intellectually) according to the occurring age ? Can’t you see that it’s not a rule, that it is unreal to make such a pattern, and that what you are asking for is not logical?
Excuse me, but I pretend to be a Muslim girl, raised in a conservative family by a believing father ( I am proud of that ). Actually, since my childhood, my father taught me that I must necessarily look in his eyes when he is talking to me. And he taught me how to block attacks and how to defend my self, how to ride and how to take back my right without crossing the ethical limits. Why? because, I have a mind, and I am a human being, and to God, there’s no difference between a “ mu’min” and a “ mu’minah” ( female and male believer).Because he must do his best to raise his child regardless to his/her gender because through this child he will pass a message to the coming generations because Prophet Muhammad( PBUH)’s wives and daughters were strong enough to be professional in public speaking and in understanding the issues of the Muslim Ummah.
Because by preparing a smart, courageous, caring woman, he knows that he will prepare a safe future family and by the way, he never takes a decision without asking my mom for her opinion. By educating your daughter to take care of her mind and about serious issues, you will not be worried about the fact that she might fall in love with the wrong man in school and that he will fool her because she will always remember how much you trusted her. The rational voice within her will always beat the illusions. She will always be a man among men, and no one of them will think of getting close to her unless he sees how much behind this character a resisting sustaining beloving wife and mom.
Dear Muslim man, my dad learns Quran by heart, and I consider him a practising believer, he was ranked the first in his university and got a presidential prize. Now he is an employee in the Tunisian public service and a professor at a certain national after- graduating school. He is handsome , charismatic hard-working and serious, when I visit him at work it is obviously seen that he’s loved and respected by his colleagues. To be honest, dad at work is not the same at home. From the very first steps he makes to our house he completely changes. Since he gets in, laughter and joy start to raise, you will find us making jokes and having fun. After dinner, he usually washes the dishes and throws the trash and gets some milk and bread for tomorrow’s breakfast that he prepares every day. Why ? because he is not a parasite that depends on mom’s service , because he believes that the best Muslim is the best to his family ( like prophet Muhammad ( PBUH) said) and because mom works and by sharing everything with her, he will not only help her but he will make our home warmer and happier ever after.
Dear Muslim man, beauty fades and all material services that a woman can do are never remaining , but what never dies is what she does , what she says , how she is intelligent enough not to mess up the equilibrium between you both and with your children and the most important what she will add to the Ummah ( Muslim Nation) .
Dear Muslim man, it is not logical that “a smart enough woman” would be that much passive, believe me, “brother”. We live in an extreme modernity, that no human being could live blank. Technology, social media and beauty bloggers all over the world have a huge impact on everything. You might say “ I don’t care about how she gets beautiful, all that I care about is the result”, but don’t you feel stupid when someone fools you by acting in an artificial way? She will learn how to be “ shy “ because she’s obliged to, but deep inside she will not be comfortable and that definitely will have a good impact on your family. Why would you accept to live in a lie ?? I think it is because you think that strength is by building some muscles in the Gym. Didn’t u know that if a given Muslim woman is not showing her beauty (though she can do it), it means that she is respecting you and that she doesn’t see you foolish to the point that you will only care about beauty , actually she is considering that you are mature and understanding enough to like her for the human being she is ( by the way it is not Haram or forbidden to like or to be proud with someone from the other gender ) .
Dear Muslim man, I challenge you to fall in love with a woman for her strength, because she will be your army the day the war starts in your life. I challenge you to love a woman for her mind because she will raise your children real knowledge far from superficial glittering actualities. I challenge you to love the daring and courageous woman but she will take risks to be with you and never let you down. I challenge you to love her for “acting like a man”, not because she is a feminist but because she respects her future husband even if she doesn’t know him yet. I challenge you to fall in love with a smart woman because she will always know what you want and she will try to make you happy in her way. I challenge you to fall in love with a practising muslimlah because she will take your hand on the path of Allah. I challenge you to fall in love with the woman that will raise your children in a way that will make the whole Ummah proud even after your death.
I challenge you to say no to stereotypes and understand your religion in the way that gives to each one of you his right.
Dear Muslim man, I challenge you to use your mind.