Letter to the Editor

As the editor of Skymall magazine I’m sure you are very busy, but what I need to discuss with you is of utmost important. I don’t know if you can tell, but I am very upset. Usually, I love Skymall Magazine. I love opening up your magazine saying “who would ever buy that?” about every single item in it. Thats why I was shocked when I opened this Skymall issue only to find useful,practical and worst of all TASTEFUL items. Could you please enlighten me as to why a magazine credited for advertising the electronic sweater vest and lifesize garden gnome has become so boring? Listen ma’am, I do not read Skymall to look at pictures of reasonably priced i-pod speakers. Or well designed barbecues. Or anything that I might actually buy my kids for Christmas. I read your magazine cover to cover because I want to experience the sheer joy of seeing a framed picture of the phrase “Princess in Training” on a pink striped background being sold for 29.99. I cannot believe that for six hours I was subjected to images of TASTEFUL jewelry! Was it your desicion to get rid of the bedazzled ring/bracelet/life alert? Are you that asshole? Look, next month I am going to Costa Rica with my family. This situation had better be addressed. There better be less digital cameras and more St. Francis sculptural lawn fountains. Do you hear me? Please, just show me one picture of an ice cooler that is also a robot so I can be a happy flyer.

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