So if I understand the main gripes you have about the movie, I think you’re saying it:
1. Plays into a a negative Asian stereotype like emasculating men.
2. Doesn’t adequately critique the excesses of wealth like the book does.
3. The public reaction to the movie makes it seem like Asian Americans are appropriating Singapore as a proxy for all Asian Americans. Which maybe plays into the all Asians are alike stereotype.
For 1. I don’t think it holds water because your only example is an insignificant side-character’s brief slapstick humor moment. As you can’t help but point out yourself towards the end of your article, the main male character Nick and the groom Colin are both portrayed as uncompromisingly masculine.
For 2. This is the only well-supported point you make, but so what? Movie adaptations can never translate everything from novels. If they had made it seem like Astrid’s husband had only staged cheating on her, it would have left a bunch of unanswered questions and unresolved plot points that the movie wouldn’t have had time to address.
For 3. I think you could make that point if it weren’t Asian Americans themselves who say they feel better represented in the movie, and likewise that Singapore seems perfectly content to get all the publicity associated with it. So what’s the crime here? That you as an Asian American that actually has ties to Singapore aren’t being elevated enough over your fellow Asian Americans? Get over yourself!