Hey Sam Grittner, firstly, I was going to highlight your whole piece, but that would be creepy, but it is true. Your story resounded with me and my state so much, were it not for the humour therein, I would have thought I wrote it. I too have been there…attempted suicide, with a noose (I am old school like that) and I survived it!! It can only be a miracle. I captured the story here and its continuation on my profile. I am glad that I survived and that you too did. I have not sought professional help (here in the South of the Sahara, seeking professional help for something that cant be measured using a thermometer is itself a sickness), but I am writng and it has been therapeutic. The thing about suicidal thoughts is that they are like that latent virus, they really never go away. Here on medium and around me, I have found a lot of love and kindness and acceptance from other survivors or friends and relatives of those who succeded in what you and I failed in. That love is palpable I tell you!

Thank you for sharing your story. It has encouraged me. I am only 28 and I hope to make it beyond 34 and more, and stories such as yours serve to tell me that it is possible. Peace and light to you, kindred spirit

Benjie