Afraid to be alone.
I was afraid to be alone.
Left with the darkest and deepest thoughts that would drive anyone mad.
Over these past few months I’ve been doing a lot of thinking on why some of us are so afraid of being of being alone but I never dug deep within it.
After a heart wrenching breakup — I started living within the loneliness that I was so curious about.
Personally during that relationship I would think about why does everyone want somebody, why can’t they just be fine being alone?
“The fear of finding oneself alone — that is what they suffer from and so they don’t find themselves at all” —André Gide
Now I’ve noticed that this relates heavily to solitude, which is often used as punishment for wrong doers. Knowing that 90% of this world is not comfortable with their own thoughts, this is what makes it punishment. Many of us find others in order to get away from those inner thoughts.
With the act of using others such as friends, family, or a companion you wouldn’t have to deal with those inner thoughts as much because alone time isn’t at a maximum.
You’ll never get to learn who you really are if you’re spending you’re time living through others.
“One man runs to his neighbor because he is looking for himself, and another because he wants to lose himself. Your bad love of yourself makes solitude a prison to you.” — Nietzsche, Thus spoke Zarathustra
Don’t put all of you marbles in one bag within your happiness in life, for once it’s cut open. What are you left with?
From my knowledge, to achieve solace in solitude — you must learn to grow by confronting the darkest within. Growing a creative mindset, expressing one’s self in anything which they can enter flow.
Solving the problems within will solve your problems externally.
Dive within the solitude, it will be terrifying but is necessary for one’s growth.
Thanks for giving me some of your time :)
Catch me on my Instagram — os.japan