How the Pandemic Made Me More Introverted Than Before

Photo by cottonbro from Pexels

I moved to Bali 2 months before the first lockdown. I remember having conflicting feelings at that time. Worried about the spread of the new virus and feeling down as I couldn’t go out socializing in a new town.

In my uni days, I enjoyed having fun and partying with my friends. But I also loved staying in my room and watching movies while chewing my favorite BBQ-flavored chips. Or I liked to go to the cinema by myself because listening to a friend sitting next to me commenting in the middle of the movie is hard to bear. But I also enjoyed watching The Hunger Games with my girlfriends. Sneaking red wine into a water bottle so we could enjoy it while looking at Katniss Everdeen and Peeta Mellark struggling to survive.

And then the Pandemic hit without warning. In 2020, I saw less than 5 friends, including my boyfriend, who lived with me. And last year, when the restriction was slightly relaxed, I saw no more than 15 people. Deep down, I enjoy the lockdown, which gives me a perfect excuse to avoid any social engagements.

I now tend to build a taller fence between myself and others. It doesn’t mean that I don’t talk to the shopkeeper or waitress at my go-to coffee shop; I still do. I don’t completely distance myself from people. But I do feel that I’ve become pickier in who I choose as friends and with whom I want to spend my time. The spark of going for drinks at the bar and socializing with others has faded away. Whenever I think of the weekend, I want to spend it at home. Either drowning in books with wine or binge-watching Netflix series — also with wine.

Do I feel lonely? No. I just love the concept of recharging myself at home, alone. And I enjoy every second of it. Even though I’m hoping this madness of foreign virus flying around is over and the restriction is fully lifted, I’m not looking forward to returning to my former self. I’m not even sure how I’d react if the world returned to normal. Time will tell, but the most important thing is that I’m happy now with myself and my wine.


Photo by Maria Orlova from Pexels



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