On Segun Adeniyi’s new “book”

Read the statement below from President Goodluck Jonathan on Segun Adeniyi’s new book about his presidency. Yes, Mr. Jonathan is right, I hear the book is hot — among Nigeria’s intellectuals doing interesting “literary” things in soulless places like the suburbs of Lekki and Abuja.

Segun Adeniyi? If you don’t remember him, it is not your fault, he is a forgettable soul, the Garba Shehu of the past, as press aide to the hapless President Umaru Musa Yar’Adua. At the time, his job was to hem and haw and obfuscate while young radicals and visionaries like Tolu Ogunlesi worked hard to rescue Nigeria from Aso Rock’s grip (hehe, you saw what I did there, right?)

I hear the book “launching” was a success, current and ex-thieves gathered, ate, drank, congratulated themselves and sprayed lots of money on Adeniyi for writing an epic book about that hydra headed monster called corruption. Abubakar was there, the man that emptied Nigeria’s treasury and handed over “democracy” to Baba Obasanjo, father of our modern Nigeria, the one some Nigerian writers call our Lee Kwan Yew! 😶

In Nigeria, a “book launching” is a crass form of “book reading.” Yes, that is how we do book readings in Nigeria! It is usually a poorly written, poorly researched book that has not known an editor. A known thief wearing a pot-belly and agbada and Nigeria's looted funds will get up and lie that he has read the book — to great applause, a lie of course, our leaders are mostly allergic to books, and then he will gift the lucky author millions of Naira! And the beat goes on!

Do we need a book to know that since Obasanjo, our leaders have been humiliating us in the eyes of the world? No. It is all on the Internet and on social media and on YouTube. Dear politicians and ghost writers, no one but yourselves read your silly little hagiographies. Every liar and thief writes a book to excoriate other liars and thieves. To hear them say it, no one is responsible for the huge looting of Nigeria since Independence. Our intellectuals and our politicians want us to believe that it is Martians that looted us blind. Just like that. And our people say the only Nigerian big man ever truly convicted of corruption was Obi Okonkwo of Chinua Achebe’s No Longer at Ease. And that was fiction.

If you like carry money go buy book wen nor consign you, which one be my own? Is it my money? But I am telling you, if you are stupid enough to buy that book, you deserve your fate! Nonsense.

Now read Goodluck Jonathan’s response to the book…

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I have just read Segun Adeniyi’s new book, ‘Against the Run of Play’ which has so far enjoyed tremendous reviews in the media. My take on it is that the book as presented contains many distorted claims on the 2015 Presidential election by many of the respondents .

There will obviously be more books like that on this subject by concerned Nigerians.

However, I believe that at the right time, the main characters in the elections including myself will come out with a true account of what transpired either in major interviews or books.

~ Goodluck Ebele Jonathan